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“Are you talking to your brother?” she said. “Because Nate and Ginger are thick as thieves.”
“I should hope so,” Ted said. “Since they’re getting married and all.” Nate hadn’t said much about the wedding, only that it would take place in the late fall, so they had plenty of time to plan it. Ginger seemed to have too much on her plate already, and Nate wasn’t much into bows and frilly things. “And no, I don’t tell him much. He knows too, though.”
“It’s a small place, this ranch,” Emma said. “I’m sure everyone knows.”
“Not your secrets, though.” As soon as Ted spoke, he regretted it. Thinking quickly, he added, “How does one keep secrets around here? You seem to have done it.”
Emma took a couple more steps in silence, and then said, “Well, it’s not easy, that’s for sure. The trick is to put yourself together and pretend you’re okay.”
The lights from the homestead shone out into the night, throwing some rays onto her face. Ted paused and studied her. “Put yourself together?”
“Yeah, you know, I always have my makeup done up right. My hair is super cute, wouldn’t you say? Every day. I get dressed every day, though I barely leave the house and I hardly ever leave the ranch. I’m not getting dolled up for the foals or my computer screen.”
Ted simply looked at her, wishing he could scrub everything off her face, and let her hair down, and unwrap the paper she’d hidden herself in one layer at a time until he could see it all. “So I’ve got to keep my beard neat and trim, cut my hair, brush my teeth, and get dressed every day.”
“The pretending is important too,” she said, looking somewhere over his shoulder. “You smile when you don’t feel like it. You laugh even if you’re not having a good time. Eventually…eventually, you’re smiling because youdofeel like it, and you’re laughing and genuinely having a good time.”
He put his fingers gently on the side of her face and made her look at him. “Is that true? You pretend you’re happy until you actually are?’
“It’s worked for me,” she said.
Ted wondered if it really had, or if Emma had somehow convinced herself that it had.
“How did you make it through prison?” She reached up and slid her fingers through his, which still rested against that smooth skin on her face.
“One day at a time,” he said.
“That’s how you keep a secret too,” she said. “One day at a time.”
Ted nodded, and they faced the homestead together. Someone peered through the window, and he knew he wouldn’t be kissing her. Sure enough, a few seconds later, Nate came out of the garage door and called, “Hey, Teddy. Can I talk to you for a sec?”
“Sure thing,” Ted called as he walked toward his friend. “See you tomorrow, Em.”
“Night,Teddy.” She grinned at him and flitted away while he tried to figure out if he should growl at her or simply bask in the flirtatious tone of her voice.
In the end, he just smiled—maybe he was pretending he was happy with the nickname?—and joined Nate as they walked toward their back deck.
“What’s up?” Ted asked.
“It’s Family Weekend next weekend,” Nate said. “And I talked to Slate today, and he said no one is coming for Dallas. I think we should go.”
“Of course we should go,” Ted said instantly. “If we’re not his family, who is?” He climbed the steps ahead of Nate. “His wife really isn’t coming?”
“His wife moved to Louisiana,” Nate said grimly. “He just found out when he got the divorce papers.”
“No,” Ted said, turning fully back to Nate.
“It’s worse,” Nate said, his mouth settling into a thin line. “She left their son and daughter at her sister’s.”
Ted reached up and removed his cowboy hat, his mind whirring now. He wanted to be there for Dallas right now, even if that meant going back inside River Bay. The man wasn’t cut out for prison, and while he’d only gotten a few years, his first had been terrible for him. If it hadn’t been for Nate, Ted, and Slate, Ted felt sure Dallas wouldn’t still be alive.
He’d spent a few nights on suicide watch, and that was when Nate had taken him right under his wing, brought him into the Mulbury fold, where Dallas had been thriving ever since. He taught mechanic classes now, and he was the leader of the Mulbury Boys now that Nate and Ted were gone.
He would not be handling himself very well right now, Ted knew that. Martha had been all he’d clung to on the inside, and Ted had met her several times as she came to visit her husband every week, like clockwork. He’d even met Dallas’s kids a couple of times, and they were great—as far as Ted knew.
He had no idea what it would be like to be a single parent, raising kids by himself. He didn’t know what it took to prep a child to go see their father in jail. He didn’t know what it was like for those left on the outside, the explanations they had to give to people, the internal fortitude it took to carry on without their loved ones.
“He only has nine months left,” Nate said.
