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With that worry taken care of, I follow Mark and John to the subway that will take us to John’s apartment. The entire time, I keep thinking about those cops and what could’ve happened if they were less nice. It could’ve been much worse.
Leaving was the right decision. As soon as our train arrives, I collapse onto a seat and bury my head in my hands. If I’d known how emotionally draining this rally was going to be, I never would’ve gone. I have such mixed feelings right now. I hate it.
Mark and John sit on either side of me. They each put an arm around my shoulders.
At least I have them. We’ve been through some hard times, but we’ve gotten through it all because we’re together. We’ll continue to do that for as long as we have each other because that’s how we work.
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.
26
John
I hate that Mari is so upset.
Just yesterday, she was excited about the rally. Even this morning, she spent an hour picking the perfect outfit to wear. It was an event full of hope for the future. She wanted to support her friend and the community she has become a part of.
Now, she looks like she regrets every second of the rally. Her face is red and puffy from all of the tears, and more continue to spill from her eyes.
We manage to get to my apartment without running into any trouble. I know my admission at the rally will cause some problems, but we’ll handle those when they come. I’m worried about Mari right now.
I pull her in for a hug. “It’s going to be okay, Mari.”
She sniffles. “It was just so scary. I thought the rally would be fun. It shouldn’t have gotten out of control like that. Why can’t people be peaceful all of the time?”
I kiss the top of her head. I don’t have an answer for her. Unfortunately, rallies often end up with some violence. Today’s event was tame compared to some of the protests I’ve attended, especially those in other countries.
“I’m sorry that you got so scared. I should have warned you about what can happen at these things. And we should’ve made sure you stayed back with Jessica. I never meant for you to be in danger or to feel so afraid.”
Mari wipes her face on her sleeve. “I didn’t know what to do. And then you disappeared! We couldn’t find you. I thought something terrible had happened…”
“Oh, Mari, I’m so sorry. I knew that the fighting would get worse if I didn’t do something. The protestors needed to know what they were gathering for. They needed a cause to get behind.”
“I know, but it didn’t need to be you! Someone else could’ve done something. Those cops had beat sticks! If they didn’t like what you were saying, you could’ve been seriously injured.”
“I’m so sorry, Mari. I wasn’t trying to scare you. I acted rashly. I knew I could get everyone to listen to me. But I should’ve thought about you and the baby first.”
Mari sniffles again. “I know why you did it, I just wish you hadn’t put yourself in danger. I can’t live without you. Either of you.”
I kiss her softly. Mark pulls us both in for a group hug. Today went nothing like I’d hoped it would, and I know Mari feels the same way. I feel awful for subjecting her to that.
“There’s one other thing,” Mari says. Her eyes lower in anger. “How could you give up your job at the university? What if they were going to punish you a different way? You might have resigned for nothing! I can’t believe you did that without talking to us about it first.”
Crap. I didn’t think Mari would be this mad about me quitting my job. We’ve already talked about how I want to travel. It shouldn’t have been a surprise. I mean, we basically went over this two weeks ago when Dr. Dryer first called us into her office. I guess Mari wasn’t as on board as we thought.
“You know that I’ve been feeling trapped in this job for a long time. Honestly, this was the perfect excuse for me to finally leave it all behind. I can continue writing, and that’ll give me the freedom to travel whenever I want.”
“But you’ve been a professor for such a long time! You had tenure! It’s crazy to give that up.”
“I was probably going to lose the job, anyway. At least now it goes down as a resignation rather than a firing.”
Mari considers this. “Oh. I hadn’t thought about it that way. Since you resigned before the school’s investigation was complete, they can’t put any of it on your record, right?”
“The media from the rally today will put it on my record, but it won’t be as harmful as if the school fired me for ‘inappropriate relationships.’ If I do ever want to get another job as a professor, I shouldn’t have a problem doing so.”
