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She rolled her head to the side to look at him. “You don’t even like court.Idon’t like court.”
“How much longer?”
“I don’t know,” she said peevishly. “A couple more months? Did you expect everyone would have just forgotten by now?”
“No. Of course not.”
“Just do something brilliant and heroic so I can forgive you in public. Figure out who wants to frame you for treason and steal from the Shipbuilder’s Guild and forge our currency.”
Satisfied, Kadou decided not to mention the fact that Eozena had wanted him to step back from that.
Zeliha shoved herself up to a seat with a groan. “Vints,” she muttered, eyeing the still-laden table. “We’ll be dead of heart disease by the end of the year if we keep eating like this. Blessings of the gods upon their heads. May the Mother smile upon them, and all the Lord of Judgment’s trials for them be easy. I shall die happy.”
“Those papers from last night,” Kadou said carefully. “Can I have them?”
Zeliha squinted at him. “What do you want them for?”
“Evidence?” He shouldn’t have eaten so much. Correction: He shouldn’t have eaten so much and then opened up difficult and serious conversations. “I’ll bring them back if you want them yourself.”
She shrugged and got slowly to her feet, moving with great effort. “Blessings on the Vints,” she groaned. “A hundred blessings on them.” She went to her desk and unlocked one of the drawers, withdrawing the sheaf of papers. “Bring these back when you’re done, all right? I might not have believed them, but . . .”
“Someone else might,” Kadou said. “Yes.”
“I don’t see how they could,” Siranos said, and added fiercely, “Whoever sent those to Her Majesty ought to be ashamed of themselves. They must think that we’re all idiots.”
Kadou moved Eyne from his lap back into her little nest of cushions and got to his feet, groaning just as Zeliha had at the uncomfortable sensation of moving when he was so full of food and coffee. Back to his rooms for a nap, then, before he faced the rest of the day—there were letters to be answered, mostly business with his holdings that he had been putting off for several days already and could theoretically put off for several more. But on a dim and dreary one like this, with the rain falling in a soft but persistent hiss and cool breaths of damp air trickling through the windows, even the prospect of opening and answering letters could hold no dread.
He took the papers from Zeliha. She followed him out of the breakfast room into the antechamber, caught his chin and kissed his cheek in a businesslike sort of way. “Don’t be angry with me anymore.”
“Who’s angry?” he said lightly.
“You. You don’t come to meals except when I invite you. You avoid me.”
“You banned me from court.”
“What else was I going to do?”
He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “I don’t know,” he said. Maybe he was angry, a little bit. Was that a crime, to be upset with his own sister? Who else was itsafeto be angry at? Not his kahyalar! Not cadets, or ministers, or citizens. There was one person in the whole country who was more powerful than him. One person who he couldn’t hurt.
Except that he could hurt her too, judging by her crestfallen expression.
“Sorry,” he said. He felt like he was saying sorry a great deal lately—he was abruptly exhausted and utterly disheartened to think of just how many people he’d been apologizing to.
“It’s very hard being grown-up like this, isn’t it?” she said bitterly. “I wish we could just go have a slap-fight in the garden like we did when we were children, and then I’d dunk you in a fountain and then you’d cry and I’d panic and we’d haggle out a peace treaty. ‘Oh, I’ll lend you my toys if you promise not to tell—’ ”
“Eyne needs siblings if she’s going to grow up to be a good negotiator,” Kadou said, stuffing the papers inside the front of his kaftan so he didn’t have to look at her.
“I can’t dunk you in any fountains these days,” she muttered. “Can’t even beat you at horse racing or lawn bowling or—”
“We can spar if you want, sometime,” he said. “That should be sufficiently dignified for the sultan of Arast.”
“Gods, no, I’m out of practice.”
“Pick champions, then.”
“That’s not fair either, you’ll pick Evemer or Eozena and they’ll wipe the floor with mine.” Zeliha sighed. “Never mind. I’m only whining because I’m lonely. Siranos is lovely company, but . . .”
He ought to say that he’d do better at being there for her, that he’d start coming to meals again, but he found that there were still tender spots in his heart, and he wasn’t yet ready to move on from them. “Well, I would have been lonely too, if you’d exiled me.”
