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“Ah,” Callie noted, missing nothing. “I see I’m not wrong. Exactly how far have things gone between the two of you?”
She wasn’t comfortable with this line of questioning at all, but if there was anyone that she could unburden herself to, it was Calliope. “I am still intact if that’s what you mean. I would never risk the chance to become with child.”
Callie nodded. “I see. But did you enjoy what you did with the duke?”
Olivia considered lying, but she couldn’t find it within her to go that far, but neither was she going to sing his praises when she was still upset with him. “I suppose it was… adequate. But then, I can’t say I have enough knowledge on the matter to make a proper decision.”
“Oh, trust me. You would know.”
It was Olivia’s turn to slide a glance to her sister. “You sound as if you speak from personal experience.”
She scrunched up her nose and didn’t even appear to be embarrassed. “I admit that a particular gentleman in London has caught my eye, but nothing has yet come of it. However, I know how I feel when we are in the same vicinity. When I see him, my stomach flutters with a thousand butterfly wings and my heart starts to race. That tells me all I need to know we would make a good fit. The only impediment is his salacious nature. He’s rumored to be quite the scoundrel.” She lifted a delicate brow.
“They usually are,” Olivia drawled, although she knew the duke to be an honorable man. She could say that for certain, at least, because when he’d had the opportune moment to seduce her as Mr. Stone when they had been alone together at the inn, he had refrained from making any lewd advances that would be detrimental to her virtue. He continued to only be concerned with her pleasure when they were together. But such an arrangement would not satisfy him for a lifetime, and especially when he was in need of an heir.
When they reached the top of the stairs, Calliope hesitated. “I know this is a hard decision for you to make, even though you have clearly made up your mind on the matter. But if you will recall, my mother died when I was just six months old from a weak heart. She suffered a long labor during my birth and never fully recovered, so if anyone understands the apprehension that you currently do, it’s me. But if you think you might have the chance to live a fulfilling life, ahappyone with the duke, don’t you think the risk is worth it?”
Olivia closed her eyes and pictured a quaint family scene with Miles, his hair graying at the temples as he laughed and tossed a toddling boy in the air, while she carried a baby girl in her arms. But while it might be everything that she might want, the fear that it would never come to pass was too disheartening. “I’m sorry, Callie. I just can’t. I should perish of heartbreak to leave my child without a mother’s nurturing love. You might be stronger than me when it comes to this, but I’m not.”
Calliope reached out and gave her a hug. “Forget your room. Let’s go to the attic and see what treasures we might uncover.” Her eyes suddenly brightened. “Or we can explore some of the estate’s forgotten passageways and see if we can remember where they lead.”
Olivia smiled, grateful that she was given a reprieve from the current burden that was starting to settle on her chest. “I’ll fetch a lantern.”
Chapter Fourteen
Miles sent word to the kitchens that they would have extra guests for dinner and that the Bevelstroke sisters’ previous rooms should be prepared, including additional beds from the guest rooms moved to their chambers.
He had been in the process of dressing for the strained event ahead, as he was quite sure Olivia didn’t yet know that Isadora had instructed the staff to move his things into the duke’s rooms immediately, as was befitting his station. He hadn’t wanted to do so, at least not yet, for fear of upsetting Olivia even further, but in the end, he had lost the battle, conceding to Lady Bevelstroke and Lady Araminta’s wishes. He wished he knew where she had gone, but considering he hadn’t caught sight of Lady Calliope either, he came to the conclusion that they were together, likely somewhere conspiring against him.
He sank down on the bed, his cravat hanging loose around his neck, having waved away the footman who had been instructed to act as the valet until his arrived. His mind was in too much turmoil to bother with the man when he was quite capable of dressing himself. He always had been, but he knew the niceties prevented him from doing so. It was one of the things he’d enjoyed about being ‘Mr. Stone.’ For the first time in his life, he hadn’t had everyone bowing down and granting his every wish.
He felt just like everyone else.
Unfortunately, now that the truth was out, it was back to being the intimidating duke.
He exhaled heavily, deciding that this had been one of the longest days of his life. The single thing that could compare was the moment that Frog’s blade had sliced through his skin, and he could feel his blood flowing out of him. Time had slowed to a near standstill while he awaited news if he would live—or die.
After Olivia had quit the study earlier that afternoon, followed by the rest of the assemblage shortly thereafter—Miles was grateful when the earl had remained behind, because if anyone might understand his current predicament, it was another man.
Grey had, indeed, been a sympathetic ear as he’d helped to rid Miles of some more of his fine brandy.
Nevertheless, he’d been grateful for the light, male conversation, all of which had nothing to do with the fact that he’d just asked Olivia to marry him and she had agreed—but only if it was a platonic union. Of course, she also wholeheartedly consented to extramarital affairs, so there was that.
He snorted at the memory of that bold statement. In truth, his brain was still reeling from it.
He stood up and walked over to the looking glass in his chamber, and slowly began to tie his cravat as he thought back to what she had said earlier that day, that her reason for denying matrimony was because her mother had died on the birthing bed. She had made the same confession to ‘Mr. Stone.’
Obviously, it was something of import to her on a personal level, and he realized that it would be difficult to offer her any permanent reassurance, for no one knew what the future might hold. He was living proof of that.
But just as he had survived, there was no guarantee that she would suffer her mother’s fate. Either way, he would just have to do his utmost to convince her that there could be some good that came from a union between them.
Attraction, for example.
He closed his eyes and took a moment to relish the taste of her sweet lips and the sight of her lovely face when she reached her pinnacle, knowing thathewas the man responsible for it.
Shaking off the rest of the memory, lest he arrive late as the host to his own dinner, Miles tied the silk into a perfect knot at the base of his throat, close enough that it would hide the hideous scar he would carry around with him forever, and loose enough that he didn’t feel as though it was choking him.
With his black breeches, silver waistcoat, and white lawn shirt already in place, he donned his black jacket last. Since most of his finer clothes weren’t at Marlington Hall, not imagining that he would have to entertain during his stay here, Isadora and Araminta had offered him the use of their father’s former wardrobe and all the contents that came with it, because they claimed they were his by right anyway.
