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“She’s afraid?” I mock, scrunching my nose and slitting my eyes. “What the hell does she have to fear?”
“Whether you understand or not, Addy has been a huge part of my life. She’s afraid that Marcellus will come for her to get to me.”
“Got it. So she’s making this whole thing about her. It’sAddywe should all protect. Since you love her and all.”
“That’s not fair. It’s not about our past, but the fact that she’s pulling strings for me. It’s unlikely that word won’t get to Marcellus about my meeting with Count Dupré. If he thinks she’s an issue for him, he could go after her.”
It’s not that I can’t see his point, but I don’t appreciate being the last to know. Not after everything we’ve shared. I deserve better, don’t I? Right now, it feels like he’s placing her on a pedestal, one that’s sitting higher than mine. It’s demoralizing.
“Does she have to stay at your place?” I ask, trying to sound like I’m a mature woman who can handle situations in a calm, collected manner. Surely, the refined and exotic Addy wouldn’t be acting so jealous.
“That’s where she’s always stayed every other time. Addy and I have been very close for many years. She hates this place and always refuses to stay here.”
“Lucky her, she has a choice,” I bite.
“Stop acting like a child, Marina. What happened to the strong woman I brought home from the auction? Where isthatgirl? She’s who I fell in love with.”
His words have the same effect as if he’d sucker punched me. They cut deep, exposing every insecurity I mask behind steel walls. My hands land on the mattress as I fall forward, knees hitting the ground as the tears spill from my eyes. A sob tears through my throat. All the stress, from being kidnapped and learning vampires walk among us to watching my friend die in front of my eyes and the only man I’ve ever loved pulling away from me, is too much for any human to endure in such a short amount of time.
Julian’s hand lands gently on my shoulder. “Marina, I—” He sighs heavily. “I wasn’t here. I’ve been in Seattle. Addy and I spent less than two hours together the day she arrived, and then I was gone. She’s been here by herself.”
“Then why not tell me?” I ask, finally turning to look at him, through tear-filled eyes.
“I have a lot on my mind. It might not be a good enough reason, but I’m begging you to work with me here. I can’t do what needs to be done with a clear head when you’re angry with me,” Julian says, in a softer tone.
In a small voice I reply, “You should’ve told me.”
“I know,” he agrees, eyes softening. He takes a seat next to me on the floor, back against the bed. “It’s what Law was angry about. He told me I needed to tell you before we left, but I didn’t want to argue.”
“That is something that Law and I definitely agree on. You should’ve never let me find out this way. Had you told me, I could’ve had time to prepare, and not jump to conclusions.”
“I recognize that,” he says, head falling back, eyes tilted skyward. “It’s why I’m so irritated. It’s not at you, it’s at myself.”
I examine his handsome profile, contemplating how we fell so far from the happy couple we were starting to become. “This is new to me, Julian. I have never been in a relationship. I have never loved someone enough to care about something like this.” My chin dips to the floor, embarrassment seeping in. “I don’t know what to do with these emotions, and you keeping me in the dark isn’t helping.”
His hand comes under my chin and lifts my head so that I’m looking at him. “You don’t ever have to be jealous of Addy. She’s just a friend.”
“But I am, Julian. I’m jealous of the fact she’s known you for lifetimes. There are things about you I’ll never be able to uncover in the one life I get. How can I not be jealous of that?”
His face falls. “What do you want me to do?”
“Treat me like an adult. If this is going to work between us, you can’t coddle me. Your half-truths are going to drive me away, or get me killed.”
He sobers, pulling me into him. “Please don’t talk like that. I can’t lose you.”
I sink deeper into his embrace, exhausted and unable to fight any longer. We’re far from being in a good place, but for now, I just want to be with him. To pretend it’s all okay.
Chapter Seven
I wake to an empty bed and groan. It’s not surprising that our bubble didn’t last long. He has an entire world of vampires to run, a brother to put in line, and an auction to stop. My worries about spending time with him seem trivial in comparison.Because they are.
Add to it the doubt and uncertainty I’ve been feeling, and I consider just staying in bed for the entire day. Not that it would make a difference. All of our troubles would still be here, waiting to be attended to. Hiding won’t help, and I refuse to sit around and be the helpless human in everybody’s way. I’m Julian’s familiar. It’s time I examine what that means and how it might be useful.
A knock sounds on the door, and before I have the chance to speak, it swings open.
“Umm... come in. I guess,” I deadpan, rolling my eyes as Katina strolls in, oblivious to my sarcasm. “Do you know where Julian is this morning?” I ask, while she flits about the room tidying things as she goes.
“He’s dining with Count Dupré. He arrived this morning, which you’d know if you woke at a reasonable hour,” she scolds, but only halfheartedly.
