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“It’s the most wonderful gift I have ever received,” she replied, and I think we all felt a bit sheepish about what we had given Nana. Her agent had made more of an effort than her own family. I had forgotten until now that he gave her the beautiful wooden Scrabble board. Before I can think too long about the significance of that, the home movie continues.
“Thank you, I’ll treasure this always,” Nana said. “I actually bought myself a gift this year too, and I wanted to share it with all of you before we start eating,” she added with a mischievous grin, then shuffled out of the room. I noticed that her slippers matched her new dress, which was pink and purple and covered in tiny hearts. We all watched from the kitchen table as she wandered out into the hall before disappearing inside her library. She continued to talk to us the entire time, shouting a little in order to be heard.
“Now, as all of you know—because I’ve complained about it often enough—things can get a little lonely here at times, when none of you come to visit and I am left alone with just my characters for company. I’ve checked the dates on all of your cards by the punch clock, and I’m not imagining being on my own more than before.So my gift to myself this year is a rather special one. I’d like you all to meet Poppins.”
The puppy on the TV screen is ridiculously cute and so small, it’s hard to believe that she grew into the giant Old English sheepdog currently sleeping in front of the fire, with hair so long now that it is plaited with ribbons to keep it out of her eyes. It’s also hard to believe that she first arrived at Seaglass all those years ago. The old dog managed to outlive Nana, which is something nobody would have predicted, not even a palm reader in Land’s End.
Miniature Poppins was passed around, and we all made a big fuss of her. I watched Nana’s agent as he smiled at the puppy, and decided that if Nana trusted the man with stars in his eyes, I would too.
“If I write a story about therealDaisy Darker, will youreallyread it?” I whispered.
He smiled again. “Yes. I promise that I will.”
“Daisy, stop bothering the man with your silly stories,” said my mother, passing Poppins to Rose—Nancy never had any real interest in dogsorbooks.
“Oh, I don’t mind at all,” Nana’s agent said with that kind smile of his. “Finding the stories hidden inside people’s heads is my most favorite thing to do.”
We look like a happy family on the screen, and it’s a nice memory to be reminded of. As usual the Halloween/birthday menu Nana had prepared for us all catered to her sweet tooth. That year we had chocolate chili con carne for the first time, along with chicken and hot chocolate gravy, jelly babies and sweet corn, chocolate-filled ravioli, fish fingers with lemon drops, white chocolate lasagna, and cola-bottle trifle. It all tasted a lot better than it sounds.
I watch, transfixed, as seventeen-year-old Lily picks up the camera off of its tripod and films some close-ups of Poppins the puppy.Then there is a shot of Nana hugging me and whispering in my ear. I can still remember what she said.
“I love you from here to the moon and back three times and once for luck.”
It was something she only ever said to me, and the memory of that moment haunts me.
The picture on the screen turns black. I’ve never seen anything that happened that evening captured on camera before. I didn’t know this tape existed until now, so I wonder if that’s all there is. But then an image of a beach at night appears, and a bonfire, and I don’t want to see any more. I don’t want to remember what happened next, or what I did. That night is why they all stopped speaking to me. It was the worst night of my life.
36
October 31, 3:55 a.m.
less than three hours until low tide
“Maybe we shouldn’t watch any more of this tape,” says Rose in a voice that doesn’t sound like her own. She remembers what happened that night too. So does Conor.
“I agree. Several members of this family have died tonight. This isn’t the time for home movies,” he says. But that isn’t why Conor doesn’t want to watch anymore.
I ignore them both and cross the room, to take a closer look at the Scrabble board Nana’s agent gave to her that year. When I see what is on it, the room seems to spin.
“Did you do this?” I ask Trixie, and she comes to stand by my side. We tend to be the only ones to play the game these days. Rose joins us to see what we are looking at, and frowns at the board.
“Was this you?” she asks our niece. “It’s really important that you tell the truth.”
Trixie shakes her head and stares wide-eyed at both of us.
Someone has spelled out our names.
Rose starts pacing again. “I don’t understand the connection to Nana’s agent, or the link with Scrabble letters.Someonehas been sticking them to the covers of our old home movies. But why wouldhebe involved in any of this? Nana loved her agent.”
“Because she couldn’t write any more new books after what happened in 1988?” Conor says, staring at the floor. “She didn’t publish anything ever again after that. What ifhetrashed her studio last night, looking for her latest work? If an author can’t write, that’s got to be bad for their agent too, right? I mean, shewashis biggest client.”
“His first and only client for a while,” I say, remembering how much I liked the man.
Rose shakes her head. “We must be missing something.”
She turns to Lily, as though hoping she might have the answer. But Lily continues to face away from us all, staring at the TV screen, as if hypnotized by what she sees. For now, all it shows is an image of a bonfire on a beach at night. The fire in the room crackles and spits again, and I see what looks like a chair leg burning on top of the logs.It’s painted blue with white clouds. I turn to Conor, and there is a scribble of a smile drawn on his face for no more than a second before a frown erases it as though it were never there. But that doesn’t mean anything. Sometimes our faces don’t know what to do with themselves when we are scared.
When I look back at the TV, I know that a lot of what happened after Nana’s birthday meal and before the bonfire on the beach is missing—moments that definitely weren’t captured on camera because Lily wasn’t filming at the time. Unfortunately, my mind remembers that night well enough to fill in the gaps.
