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“I never asked you to marry me,” she whispers, her mouth only an inch from mine.
“I know that.”
“I don’t need you to put a ring on my finger or your name in my skin to feel like you love me. I need you totell me, and show me." She rubs her fingers across my jaw. "You just used all those words to tell me the same thing you could've said in three."
"I..." I can’t say it. I can’t finish the thought.
She puts her finger over my lips, then replaces it with her own lips. "I know you aren't ready. It's okay."
That's not what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid I might never be ready to say those words again, not even to her.
Chapter Twenty
Nell
“David called me,” I admit in the darkness of the bedroom as Knox pulls his boxers down. Now isn’t the right time to discuss this, but I can’t let him inside me without telling him the truth. I feel guilty.
Knox’s angry face comes out, jaw clenched and nostrils flared. “When?”
“He called while you were yelling at Pres tonight.” It’s why I wasn’t downstairs already.
Knox snarls down at me. “You answered, didn't you?”
Oh, this is going to go badly. I just gave him shit about loving me and here I’ve done this. “Yes.”
Knox’s tongue pushes his bottom lip and he straightens his boxers back up against his hips. “What did he say? How much he loves and misses you and wishes you’d come back?” He looks completely disgusted as he says those words.
“Pretty much.” That's basically exactly what David said when I picked up. I know that he only misses my money and the way I took care of him. Not that it would matter if he did really love me. I’m so wrapped up in Knox now that I can’t imagine any other man so much as catching my attention.
“Are you going?”
“What?” I screech, flipping the light on so I can actually see his face as he says those words to me. How could he ever think that I would leave him for David? “Why the fuck would I do that?”
He looks even more pissed than I thought he would be. “Why the fuck would you answer the call in the first place?”
Fear spirals through me. Knox is mad as hell, and rightfully so. I shouldn’t have answered. That’s why it’s been making me feel guilty since I did it. “I don’t know. I promise, I do not miss him. I don’t know why I answered. Curiosity I think. I wanted to know if he survived your beating.”
“Seeing his name on your phone wasn’t enough?” He takes a step backwards, distancing himself from me.
“Knox, don’t-”
Knox sucks his teeth and makes a tsk sound, cutting me off. “Did he satisfy your curiosity?”
I walk across the bed on my knees so I can touch his bare chest. He’s mad, probably a little scared that I’m going to leave, and I think the easiest way to ease those fears will be to show him that he doesn’t have anything to be afraid of, to show him how much he owns me, and maybe I’ll help him release some of the tension in the process. “He could never satisfy me. Not like you.” I force my hand down into his boxers and wrap my fingers around his hard-on. My long lashes bat slowly and I stare up into his eyes as I move my hand up and down over his cock.
His hand grips the back of my head, holding me there. “You’re not leaving me, Nell. You chained me to my bed for almost a whole month. I’ll do it to you.”
That should not turn me on more, but it does. “I know you would.” I tighten my hand around him and he hisses. “I’m not leaving.”
“Get down on your knees and prove it to me.” That deep, commanding tone of his voice could probably get me to do anything.
I push him away with my hand so I can get down to the floor and kneel in front of him. I lick over the tip first, looking up at his dark eyes and watching the way his hair falls around his face while he watches me. My tongue traces down to the base and back up, and then I close my lips around the head.
Knox loses control in the sexiest of ways. He closes his eyes and opens his mouth, and then grabs the back of my head in one hand and my jaw in the other. He pushes his cock to the back of my throat then pulls back. “Can you take it?”
I nod as much as I can with his dick in my mouth and my heart fluttering that he stopped to check on me. I can take it, no matter how rough he wants to be.
“Good,” he growls down at me. He forces himself further down my throat to the point that it hurts and he just grips my jaw harder. “This mouth is all mine. Not for you to talk to another guy.” He fucks into my throat harshly for a few more thrusts before he pulls out and points to the bed. “Hands and knees.”
