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All these memories remind me that I’m the outsider. I’m the nobody that none of them actually knows. One of them thinks I’m pretty right now, but if it weren’t for that, I’d never know these people; and I’m yelling at Bobby after he took care of my kid brother all day?
What the hell is wrong with me?
Humiliation burns the backs of my eyes and sends my heart racing. I’ve brought my family drama to these good people. They don’t deserve that.
The anger I was feeling in the ring simply turns to exhaustion. Physically and emotionally. I’m not mad anymore, not at Bobby – I was never mad at Bobby – and not even at Jack. I’m just… tired.
“Listen, Bobby.” I turn from the wall of history to face him. I need to get this off my chest, then I intend to run away to have a good long cry in the shower. “I’m sorry for making a scene a few minutes ago. I embarrassed you, and I embarrassed myself, so I apologize for that. I also want to apologize for the drama with Jack. I got lazy and allowed you to deal with my problems by watching him today. It won’t happen again. I’ll take him home now and we’ll distance ourselves. Your gym won’t be connected with us in any way, so he won’t be representing you… ormisrepresenting you, if he gets into more trouble. I’m truly thankful for everything you’ve done to help me since we met. I appreciate the friendships you and your brothers have given me most of all. I appreciate our one-on-one training, I know you didn’t have to do that, and Iknowyou’re severely undercharging me for it. Add on top the fact you’ve become a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. Quite beyond your pay grade, huh? Sorry about that, too.” My heart stutters painfully in my chest. Letting out a heartbroken sigh, I finish it. “My life is overwhelming.” I meet his eyes. “I just don’t have it in me to take on anything extra.”
His strong jaw grinds dangerously. “Defineextra, Catherine?”
“Extra…”Heart. Broken. “As in, you.”
Jesus. Did I just break up with Bobby? Break up isn’t the right word, since we hadn’t even started dating, but I can’t think of another way to describe the pain coursing through my chest.
Tomorrow night was supposed to be our first date. Instead, I’ll be sitting at home in my fat girl pants while throwing bitterness and anger at Jack for getting suspended and inadvertently turning me into a bitch toward Bobby.
Bobby steps forward slowly. His large muscles bunch and vibrate under the black tank that hugs them. He’s pissed.Waypissed. “You done?” he snaps. “So, you’ve decided, huh? You make the decision for us both? And for Jack, too. You decide you’re too busy for me? Like I’d be a burden.” He stabs a finger in my direction. “Did you ever stop to think I could help lessen your load? More hands make lighter work, Kit. Ever heard that?”
“Yes, but–”
“Nope, I let you speak, I heard you out. Now you’ll shut up and hear me.” I snap my mouth closed in shock. “I never said you embarrassed me earlier in the ring. Nor did you embarrass yourself. I didn’t say that, and I didn’t imply it. That’s on you. So what if you raised your voice? We do it all the fuckin’ time around here!” His final word is a shout, just to push his point home. “And as for Jack being here today; that wasn’t special treatment for him, or for you. That wasn’t babysitting. That wasn’t me trying to get into your pants. Every person that walks through those doors and wants to fight for us must abide by our rules. If they break them, they pay the price. It doesn’t mean we’re embarrassed by them. It doesn’t even mean we’re pissed at them. It means they broke a rule and need to pay consequences. That’s it. It’ll probably happen a few more times over the years, because guess what? Teenagers are assholes! Don’t let it get in the way of whatever we have here. Which, according to you, is nothing!” He throws his arms into the air in frustration. “Stupid me, I thought you liked me. I know I fucking like you. I want to know you. I want to take you on a date tomorrow night, possibly even touch your tits a bit, but it seems you think you get to make all the calls. Did you think I’d sit like a good puppy and let you dump my ass before we even got started? I’m not ready to call it a day, Kit! So, you know what? I don’t accept your apologies. Fuck that shit! And as an aside; that drama you think you’re bringing here… You need to discuss that with him. Which isexactlywhat I tried to tell you ten minutes ago before you decided to get mean. He told me some stuff today that you need to know. Yeah, it’s drama, it’ll probably add drama to your plate, and I’m sorry for that. I’d shield you if I could, but I can’t.” He looks me straight in the eyes. “But you need to know, he wasn’t in the wrong. I’ll never agree that he was. He faced down something really difficult, and he stood up for the right thing even though giving in would’ve been easier.”
“Bobby–”
“As for everything else you said – No, and fuck no! You don’t get to distance yourself like that, not without a good reason. If you genuinely think this gym isn’t working out for you, fine. If you’re not interested in me, then go, break my heart, walk away. But if that’s not true, then stop being a fucking martyr! You don’t have to shoulder everything on your own.”
“Bobby. I’m sor–”
“So, I’ll be expecting Jack back here tomorrow. Then your ass better be back in the gym tomorrow night so I can train you for free. It feels tacky to chargeyousoIcan watch your ass move in sexy little shorts. After that, I’ll come to your house to pick you up for our date. That gives you one single fucking hour to wash your pretty hair. I won’t be late, and I refuse to waste our time. Now give me a good reason why that shit ain’t happening.”
“Um…”
“Got it?” He turns away. “Good!”
I bite my lip to stop a smile from blooming. Big bad Bobby Kincaid just had a tantrum worthy of a three-year-old, and I don’t know if I should be scared or just flat out impressed.
He stands on the opposite side of the room facing the wall with a ticking jaw and adrenaline filled muscles. I bite my lip so hard it stings, but the tiniest of squeaks escapes my lips, then I dissolve into all out giggles.
I’m dead. I can’t even. “Got it?” I fall into a fit of laughter. “Good!”
Bobby turns back as I transition from laughter to hysteria, which only makes me laugh more. The stress of this past year has me bubbling over into crazy town. I’ve officially lost the plot, but then his own lips transform from scowl to smile and I hold my stomach from the pain my laughter causes. “Fuck it, Bobby. Don’t fight it. Ride the high.” I snort as tears escape from my eyes. The crazy snorting breaks him, and Bobby crosses over to the dark side and laughs, too.
Fuck it, fuck it all.
I hiccup and hold my stomach. “I’m sorry, Bobby. I’m sorry for trying to blow you off. It wasn’t personal. I think you’re hot as shit, and you said my hair was pretty, so that probably means you’re stuck with me for life. Or until you leave crumbs on a clean counter. That shit sends me insane. But you’re right, everything you said was right. We’ll be back tomorrow. I’ll wash my hair for you, and maybe I’ll let you touch my boobs sometime.”
“Oh my God,” he cries out on a laugh. “I can’t believe I yelled that I wanted to touch your boobs! Who does that?” He dramatically throws his arms in the air. “I mean, I was thinking it, I’m always thinking it, your tits are amazing, but I shouldn’t shout about it!”
A knock on the office door has us turning with goofy smiles. Jimmy pokes his head in with a silly smirk, and Jack bobs around in an attempt to look over his shoulder. “What’s going on? Bobby having another tanty?”
My snorts start all over again. I try to stop it, I know it’s not ladylike, but it just won’t stop.Tanty!Tears leak from my eyes and a stitch digs into my ribs as the three guys watch my sanity dissolve in front of them.
Squeezing by the guys like water moving through rocks, Casey walks right in and stops in front of me with a smile. “You have no clue how happy I am to hear that sound.”
My smile turns shaky and my laughter turns to sobs. “Shit, Case. I’m sorry!”
Her poor face drops as she grabs at my hands. “What? What happened?” We haven’t laughed in ages. My best friend is one of the funniest people I know, and yet I’ve let my drama drag us down. No wonder she happily intended to watch the fight alone tonight. No one in their right mind would want to hang with my sour ass.
