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She elbowed me in the ribs. ‘How’s it going with Si? It must be serious if he’s asked you to move in with him so soon. He’s not usually one for doing anything without months of meticulous planning.’
I smiled. ‘I had noticed that.’
‘You’re very different to his ex,’ she said, looking at me thoughtfully. ‘In a good way, obviously,’ she added quickly.
I tried not to let myself feel threatened by the idea of an ex-girlfriend who was nothing like me. The truth was, he’d barely mentioned her, or any of the other relationships he’d had. On the odd occasion I’d tried to start a conversation about it, Si had fobbed me off with some charming sentiment about not caring about the past now that he’d met me. And in some ways that suited me perfectly: he wasn’t interested in hearing about my past relationships either and since they were pretty much a disaster across the board, I wasn’t exactly eager to volunteer the information.
‘Has he told you much about what happened?’ asked Catherine, opening a plastic folder entitled ‘Wedding Ideas’ and flicking through it until she got to what looked like the invitations section.
I shook my head. ‘He hasn’t really talked about her.’
Catherine looked surprised. ‘Not at all?’
‘Not really.’ And then curiosity got the better of me. ‘Why, what was she like?’
Catherine looked at me earnestly. ‘What she did to him was horrendous. For Si especially, but it hit all of us hard, the entire family.’
This was more interesting than I’d thought. What was this terrible, very dramatic thing that had happened to Si that he hadn’t told me about?
‘They were together for three years,’ said Catherine in a hushed tone. ‘And he did everything for her, Hannah. Absolutely everything. He drove her around, he picked her up from here, there and everywhere. Took her on romantic city breaks every five minutes. He helped her buy a flat, he found her a new job. He basically organised her entire life for her.’
‘Right,’ I said, thinking that dynamic sounded very familiar. It sometimes felt as though Si was the parent in our relationship and that I was the wanton child who needed pulling into line.
‘They were basically the golden couple of Berkhamsted,’ said Catherine, on a roll now. ‘We’d known her for years. Her dad played golf with my dad. It was almost inevitable they’d end up together.’
‘Sounds like it,’ I said, starting to feel uncomfortable. I could just picture the perfection of it.
‘So you can imagine the devastation all round when it turned out she’d been shagging Si’s best friend, Will. For months. And nobody had had a clue, least of all Si, of course.’
‘Blimey,’ I said, shocked. I hadn’t expected that.
‘He was in bits,’ said Catherine. ‘We were all really worried about him.’
I was confused, though. Why on earth hadn’t he told me? He’d given me the impression that he’d breezed through life without a hitch and I would have much preferred to have known that things hadn’t run altogether smoothly for him, either.
Catherine put her hand on my arm.
‘Anyway, that’s all in the past now, Hannah. I can see how much he adores you, it’s practically radiating out of him,’ she said.
I smiled politely at her, my mind ticking over. I wondered, suddenly, how wise it was to move in with someone I clearly knew very little about.
‘I’m serious, Hannah,’ said Catherine, taking my hand. ‘I honestly can’t thank you enough for making my brother happy again. You’re just what he needs. You’re a tonic. A new lease of life. No wonder he’s grabbing it with both hands.’
I smiled at her, attempting to radiate calm, but really feeling the beginnings of panic. My chest felt tight and sweat prickled at my hairline. I pushed up the sleeves of my jumper, wishing I’d worn something lighter. It was just that this was all a bit much to take in. I’d only known Catherine about half an hour and already I’d had more of an insight into Si’s history than I’d had from him since we’d met.
‘I think we’re going to get along brilliantly,’ she said triumphantly, although I wasn’t sure what she’d based that assumption upon.
‘Hope so,’ I said, sort of meaning it. I wasn’t sure what to think right at that moment, about this or anything else.
‘Now,’ said Catherine, spreading out the folder across both of our laps. ‘Have a look at these invitations, will you, and tell me whether you prefer the pink trim or the blue? My fiancé likes blue, but Mum’s keen on the pink.’
I immediately felt under an unbelievable amount of pressure to conjure up a list of wanky adjectives about how amazing they both were, and what a bind it must be for her, having to choose.
I logged out of Si’s account and sat with my hands underneath my thighs. I wanted desperately to give him the benefit of the doubt, but my mind wouldn’t settle and my stomach was flipping about all over the place. I got up and moved across to the window, leaning into the pane. It was even busier down on the quayside now, full of kids from a local school out on their lunch hour. I watched them, milling about in their cliques, smoking and shouting to each other.
‘Hey,’ said Léo, appearing next to me, his hip bones resting against the glass. He was slightly shorter than Si, I noticed. The top of my head was level with the tip of his shoulder.
‘Hey,’ I replied, trying to sound normal.
