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“I don’t know,” she says quietly. Well, she might not know, but I do. That’s an answer in itself.
“Right, well, I’m gonna take off. And I’ll speak to you in a few days or whatever, when you’ve had time to think.” It’s a dick move, but I have to protect myself.
“Phoenix, I have to go sweetie. I’ll see you soon,” I tell her and I bend down to give her a little hug. She whines that she doesn’t want me to go - you and me both, rugrat - and begs me to stay. I promise to come back soon. I hope I don’t have to break that promise.
“Reb…”
“I’ll see myself out, Charlotte.” It’s a low fucking blow to use her real name after what she just said to Phoenix, and when she gives a sharp intake of breath I know my arrow has hit its mark. Good.
No, not good. I don’t want to hurt her. I’m being a fucking dick. But now I don’t know how to put things right. I walk past her and she rises to her feet and follows me anyway.
At the front door I pause and turn to her.
“I’m sorry, Princess,” I tell her, pulling her into my arms for a hug. Thankfully she returns it, clinging on for dear life. “Take as much time as you need, Raven.”
I give her one last squeeze, and let her go. Then me and my damaged ego leave, heading off to lick our wounds.
Charlotte’s Diary
07/05/20
Starting to fear I sound like a broken record but thank God for Baxter. He tackled the Cordelia situation with a calm efficiency that I could only ever dream of being capable of.
He immediately offered to hire the best solicitors in the country and fight Cordelia to the bitter end, but, actually, despite everything she’s done, I don’t want that.
Lizzie and I went through most of our childhood not knowing our grandparents. We had no family besides our parents and each other, and we were always envious of the kids at school who had big family Thanksgivings or Christmases, or even just cousins to play with.
I don’t want that life for Phoenix.
Sure, Cordelia is just one extra person in Phoenix’s life, but it’s better than it being just me.
When I explained this to Baxter he got really quiet, and I sense there’s a story there (not that he’d ever open up and confide in me) but after a moment or two, he seemed to understand. He suggested we reach out to Cordelia to come to an arrangement.
She agreed, we met, a deal was struck. I’m not exactly comfortable with the outcome, but it's better than dragging Phoenix through the courts.
