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Phillip straightened and looked at me, his brows furrowed. He sighed and flopped back in the couch. “You caught my attention that first night in the drawing class. The reason we had a sketch of you for the employee avatars was because I drew you after the modeling session was over.”
How was I supposed to respond to that? Elation? Feeling flattered? His tone didn’t imply I should be either of those things… or really much of anything at all. So I settled for, “oh?”
“You reminded me of my wife.”
The dead one. That sounded cold, but what was I supposed to say? Did he see a ghost when he looked at me? “Oh.” Wow, I was witty this afternoon.
“I know how that sounds. It’s not that I see her when I look at you, but your focus that night, the way you held yourself… But you’re not a replacement for a memory. I look at you, I see Adrienne. And I finally figured out, you remind me of her because like her, you see the world through your own, unique lens. It’s in your art, it’s in the things you say and do, and it’s at the core of who you are.”
I still didn’t know how to respond. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Every time you apologize for being you, for taking up space, I cringe, because no one should do that, but especially not you. I want to beat the shit out your ex-husband for making you think that was necessary. For making you afraid to be alone in your own apartment on a Saturday afternoon.”
How did he do that? Crawl inside my head and know exactly what to say, but at the same time be so clueless about other things, like that it was a bad idea to lie to Dustin about leaving Aces.
My phone rang, shattering the strange mood in the room. I glanced at the screen. “It’s Graham.” I pressed Answer. “Hey,” I greeted my brother.
“I was in a movie. Are you okay?”
The conversation with Phillip was odd, but sitting next to him, his arm and thigh pressed against me, I felt safe. “I freaked out a little, but I’m better now.”
“A little?” Graham chuckled. “You called each of us at least three times.”
Right. “It’s dumb, but I couldn’t shake the feeling Sean was out there.”
“That’s not dumb. Not after what he’s been pulling,” Graham said. “I don’t want you staying there tonight.”
Me neither.
“I’ve got it covered,” Phillip said.
Could he hear the conversation? Possibly. He was sitting pretty close.
“Sounds good.” Graham’s response implied he heard Phillip as well. “I’ll keep my phone nearby if you need anything.”
“Thank you.” I disconnected, not knowing how to feel about the exchange. Some guy basically told my brother I was sleeping over. Sure, I was in my thirties, and it was a little late in life for that kind of propriety, but until Graham found Luna and Cole, we barely talked about relationships in our family, let alone alluded to there being a physical aspect.
Unless I counted the number of times my parents asked me when I was going to find a nice man and give them grandbabies.
“Pack a bag.” Phillip interrupted the thought. “You’re staying at my place until we get this figured out.”
We? My frustration welled. “I won’t let Sean push me out of my apartment. The place I had to get because he forced me out my house. I’m tired of him, of anyone else, determining the direction of my life.” Except I didn’t want to be here. Didn’t feel safe here.
“You’re not staying here or alone tonight.” Phillip stood and tugged me to my feet. “This isn’t permanent but I need you safe.”
The sudden movement stole my balance and I landed with my face inches from his. My breath caught at the intensity in his gaze. He had such gorgeous eyes—brown with flecks of gold and grief.
He brushed a thumb along my cheekbone. “You’ll figure this out—we will. If you need a sounding board. Anything. We’ll stay here, if you prefer. Tell me where you feel safest.”
“Not here.”
I need you safe, the words echoed in my head as I grabbed a couple of days’ worth of clothes, and toiletries, and shoved it all in a bag.
When did I lose control of my life? Or had I ever really had it?
