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“But Mom.” Harmony put down her fork and looked at me with a serious expression.
“Yes?”
“We didn’t get to spend very much time at California Adventure. Alana wanted to go on more rides.”
Alana rolled her eyes, pushed back from the table, and stalked upstairs. A door slammed shut.
Harmony frowned. “She didn’t take her plate to the sink.”
“I don’t think your sister’s feeling well.” I winced inwardly at the tiny untruth. “You can help me with dishes. Like Cinderella.”
“But you’re not evil, Mom.”
Bless her.
When we were done, Harmony skipped back to her room to introduce her new Dumbo stuffie to SpongeBob.
I kept myself busy with polishing my resume and sending word out through a few close friends that I was looking for new work. The tasks didn’t keep me from wondering how to get Alana to talk to me, and worrying about her didn’t stop me from wanting to pick up the phone and redefine things with Colin and Tanner to keep the sex in our lives.
I was horrible.
A little before five, Dustin called. “Everything all right there?” he asked when I answered.
That wasn’t suspicious at all. “Why?”
“Alana called me and told me she and Harmony were coming to live with me.”
Fuck. At least she hadn’t called Joe.
“I thought they were supposed to be in California for a couple more days. What happened?” Dustin said.
I gave him the high-level list, keeping things extra vague around, “I slept with my house guests,” and culminating with, “At least we were all dressed when Alana walked in the room.” I didn’t have much energy left to keep the story emotionless, and my voice cracked on those last words.
“Dar…”
“Don’t.” I stopped him at his kind tone. “I don’t want sympathy or pity or even understanding. I fucked up.”
He sighed. “You do the best you can. You do better than most.”
“Not a high bar, Dustin.”
“How about this, then? I’ll loan you my girlfriend for the night.”
I scowled at the phone. Now he was making fun of me, despite the lack of teasing in his voice. “I can’t see how that’s going to do anything except make the situation worse.”
Dustin chuckled. “Not like that. Call Carly. Addie’s already calling Luna and Reese. Go out for the night. No pressure. Just some unwinding. Leave Alana and Harmony here, and clear your head.”
“Ignoring reality is what got me into this.” Guilt gnawed me at the simple thought of doing what he suggested. Having fun when the world around me was falling apart? Nope.
“You’re not ignoring things. You’re approaching the situation from a different angle.”
I couldn’t.
“Are you going to sit at home and sulk instead?” Dustin’s question was kind. “If Alana isn’t talking to you, she may talk to me.”
I did need to give Alana some space, and I needed it to not be with Joe.
“I’ll spoil them while they’re here. Give them too much ice cream.” He was a master at walking that fine line between just enough and too much spoiling.
