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Taken aback, she blinked, thinking for a moment. Then, taking a deep breath, she told Fergus, “Start by stopping. Stop running away. And let me in.”
“I will try,” he assured her then shook his head. His head swam, his pulse still hammering in his throat. He wanted to open up to her, to stop being defensive and cruel. He did not know why he reacted this way to her, but he wished he did so that he could explain it to her. “But right now, I cannot, so I must ask you to be patient. Please. Walk with me for a bit?”
“You truly promise?” she asked quietly, her whole body softening.
“I truly promise,” he said. “I cannot promise to be perfect. Or that I will be good at it. But I promise. I wanted to when I returned today. But right now… right now, I cannot.”
He tried to take a shaky breath and held his arm out to her again, hoping that if he could just spend time in her presence, in her quiet comfort, he might be able to feel comfortable and relaxed again. “Let us continue on our turn about the garden. Just stay with me for a while. Can you do that?”
She placed her hand gingerly on his arm again. Her expression still looked cautious but conflict filled her eyes. Then, gently, she told him, “If that is what you need from me right now.”
He covered her hand with his own and smiled gratefully down at her. Her kindness and understanding knew no bounds. Other women might demand more from him, push him further, ridicule and demean him, but Edwina did not. She did not seem like someone who could be vengeful or cruel — like so many other women in theton.
“You are exactly what I need right now.”
