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“You shouldn’t be alone,” she chided. “It’s not safe.”
“You’re alone.”
I stared at her. She looked about as good as I felt, and that wasn’t saying much.
She looked me over, her lips curving downward. “You’re dying.”
I knew. The words that had been whispering in my head for days had been uttered into reality. That meant there was no going back. No undoing of anything.
“I came to…” She bit her lip then glanced over her shoulder. “I came to warn you. I heard what happened with Eli. Never do that again. You’re too human to survive what you’re putting your body through.” She sounded anxious. “Stop helping the wolves. Don’t help anyone. Hide from Eli instead.”
“I can’t hide forever.”
“Try. He’ll play with you, like a cat with a mouse, hurting you, letting you live, making you suffer until it’s no longer fun. He’ll enjoy watching you grow so weak that you can’t protect yourself, never mind anyone else. Don’t let it come to that. Don’t let him have his way.”
“He’s your brother.” It wasn’t a question.
“Yes,” she whispered, anguish in her eyes. At least they weren’t dead anymore. “And that’s how I know that you are not safe anywhere near him. He doesn’t know how to stop.” She shuddered. “He’s never known how to stop hurting people.”
“What’s wrong with him? I saw… he’s weird. Not like you or me.”
“Don’t worry about understanding him,” she said. “Worry about staying out of his way.”
“Why do you stay with him if he’s so scary?” I asked. “What’s so good about your cult that you’ll put up with him?”
“I tried to leave. Thought I could outrun my blood.” Her gaze turned distant. “A good man died because of my greed, my arrogance, my hope. Yet I kept hoping. I hoped that these things would never touch you. I hoped that if I sent you away, you would be safe, but here we are, and I’m sorry for that.”
“I’m not sorry that I’ve helped people.” My voice came off pathetically shaky. I still meant the words. I had no regrets. I only wished I was stronger.
“I can tell.” Was that pride in her voice? “I used to be brave, too. I didn’t tell the whole story about your father, but I had to watch him die. I tried to save him, but it almost killed me, and I couldn't save him at all. Eli was too strong. I didn’t have a chance against him.”
“I’m sorry,” I said without even thinking, but I was sorry. I knew how scary Eli could be, how much it took to face him, but she had been entirely alone. At least I had people on my side. “What did he do when you fought back?”
“Made me wish I died with your father.” She smiled, a frighteningly empty smile. “He sent me home in disgrace, told everyone I had gone mad. Maybe I had. They didn’t care either way as long as I was home. They sent me back to the sensory room to ensure my loyalty, and somewhere along the way, I forgot how to be brave. I never dared to think of escape again, but when I heard about a girl with power, I knew it had to be you.”
“What did you think? I mean… had you ever thought about me?”
“I locked you away in a place they couldn’t reach,” she said, her lips trembling. “Thought that would be enough, but fate is a dangerous thing. I got greedy again, thinking I could satisfy my curiosity. I just had to see how you turned out, but I only succeeded in bringing him here, too. His obsession with me is… I don’t know how he found out, but he knew I came here, knew I lied when I told him you died as a baby. He always knows. It’s all my fault this is happening.”
It was the most I’d ever heard her speak. “It’s not your fault,” I told her. “The werewolves went to your compound because of me. They revealed themselves, drew attention to themselves, because of me. That’s not your fault.”
“I created you. I abandoned you. I’m the only one to blame for everything.” She bit her lip. “I wish things were different.”
“You came here though. For me. You want to help me, don’t you?”
“I’ll pay for it,” she whispered. “So will you. This must be our destiny.”
After meeting Eli, I didn’t doubt he would want to make us pay.
“So how long do I have?” I asked. “Long enough to finish things with Eli?”
“Finish things? You’re dying. Even if you don’t help another person survive death, you’re still dying. The damage is done. The only question is when your body will give out.”
“I know.”
She looked horrified. “Why have you been helping them if you know?”
“I can’t stop it,” I admitted.
