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Just when I spot a glimmer of hope, Cora speaks. And her words are far from what I expect to come out of her mouth.
“This can’t happen, Gavin.” She gestures between us. “This is too much. Even if you are telling me the truth now, I can’t deal with bullshit drama like this. Women claiming ownership over you. Women saying vicious things to steal you from me. Why would you hide something like this from me? Because you thought it would never be an issue between us?” She pauses to catch her breath. “I knew this was a mistake. I need to leave.”
No. No, no, no. This cannot be happening. This cannot be fucking happening. I cannot lose her. Not again. And not over this.
She swipes her purse from the table and starts for the door. I freeze momentarily, not wanting to believe this is my reality. That I am losing her again after finally getting her back. It’s like I am sixteen all over again. Like I don’t have a say in the matter. Like what I want doesn’t count and won’t be taken into consideration.
I refuse to let this be how we end. Downright refuse.
The heavy hotel room door slams shut and snaps me back to reality. No!
I bolt to the door and yank it open. Stepping out into the hall, I look left then right before spotting Cora. She isn’t running, but her feet trek along the carpet faster than a steady walk. I sprint after her, giving no fucks that I have just locked myself out of my room.
“Cora,” I yell. “Wait. Please, let me fix this.”
She stands in front of the elevator banks and religiously mashes the down button like her life depends on it. Her teary eyes glance my way and it rips open every suture in my stitched-up heart.
I did this to her. I hurt her. Again.
The elevator car arrives and she steps in, the doors closing just as I approach. Damnit. I smash the down button, hopeful the elevator car she stepped in reopens. Seconds later, the other set of doors opens and I jump in and hit the button for the bottom floor. The car pings as it passes each floor, my heart wrenching tighter and tighter with each second I spend away from her. Not knowing if she has already reached the lobby and is darting out the doors to her car.
When the doors slide open, I dash out and scan the lobby for Cora. My eyes land on her as she weaves between people in the full reception area and I race toward her. As long as she remains in my line of sight, I will catch her. I will not let her go this easily. Not after the strides we have made this week. Not after I got back the only person who matters.
“Cora,” I yell. Instantly, every set of eyes on the ground floor whips my way. “Please wait.”
She peers over her shoulder, tears trailing down her cheeks, and makes a beeline for the exit. Just as she makes it to the door, I catch up to her and grab hold of her arm. As badly as I want to haul her into me, to wrap my arms around her and pin her to my chest, I stop myself. Now is not the time. Although I won’t let her leave without a fight, I won’t be the man who doesn’t give her a choice. After everything we have endured, she deserves to choose what happens next.
“Let me go, Gavin,” she spits out as she tries to yank her arm from my grasp.
“No, baby. Please, let’s talk about this,” I beg. “Please let me explain everything. I wasn’t intentionally keeping this from you. And, like I said, it’s not real.”
Her soft, sad bloodshot eyes stare up at me, pleading with me to let her go as nonstop tears spill down her cheeks.
This pain, her pain… what she is experiencing in this very moment. If it is even remotely close to what she felt when I left thirteen years ago, I hate myself. I hate myself for doing this to her. For letting her experience such heartbreaking emotions. Again. No one should have to undergo this form of torture—once, let alone twice.
“Please, Gavin,” she mumbles, her eyes darting around the room. Embarrassment creases her brow as she squeezes her eyes shut. “Please just let me go.” When she opens her eyes, a new emotion paints her expression. Disparity and numbness. An emptiness that has me stumbling back, physically and mentally. “Can’t you see?”
See what? That I have inflicted the worst pain on the sole person I live and breathe for. Yes, I see it. I hate that I see it. But something twists in my gut and stabs at my heart. And I have a feeling her words have an ulterior meaning. Definition unbeknownst to me.
“See what, baby?” I ask, terrified to know the answer. Terrified of what she will say next.
I ache to touch her. Yearn to embrace her and pepper kisses on her hair, her temples, her forehead. But I fear the worst. That she will pull away. Reject me. And her rejection would sting worse than any words. So, I keep my hands at my sides and imagine all the ways I wish to right my wrongs.
“Isn’t it obvious?” she asks, not waiting for me to answer before she continues. “It’s like the universe is trying to tell us something.”
Cocking my head, I narrow my eyes in confusion. Is she suggesting what I think she is? That we don’t belong together. That as much as we love each other, we aren’t meant to have each other.
How could something so perfect not be meant to exist?
The universe isn’t trying to tell us shit. And if for some nonsensical reason she believes fate is telling us we don’t belong together; I will grab fate by the balls until it comprehends the truth. That Cora and I belong together. Always have and always will.
And until I fix this, nothing else matters.
“Baby, I have no idea what you’re thinking, but it better not be anything along the lines that we aren’t meant to be together. Because that’s bullshit and you know it.”
Cora turns away from me and walks out the exit with me hot on her heels. Her pace picks up and I jog to keep up with her. She darts past the valet and heads for the lot where she parked her car.
I will not suffocate her. She needs time to mull things over. But she has to know things between us won’t get better if we don’t discuss them. She needs to hear the whole story.
