AllFreeNovel
Share Us
It’s been so long since I’ve kissed him, but in my head I always imagined it was everything. The heat, the forcefulness mixed with a tenderness that smoldered with desire. I thought a few months ago that I made him seem larger than life in my memory. That it was all in my head.
But it’s real. Every bit of it is real. The way he kisses, the way he does everything, is even better than I remember.
My fingers play with a small smatter of hair on his chest as I wonder if he wants me to stay a little longer, or if I should go. More importantly, I wonder if anything at all has changed.
CHAPTER7
Madox
Seven years ago
“You don’t have to look at me like that,” I tell her as she stands there, nervously fidgeting with her fingers.
“I’m sorry--”
“Stop saying you’re sorry,” I command her without thinking about it. She shouldn’t be sorry. I hate that she looks at me like that.
“Okay,” she whispers, her wide, deep blue eyes seeking approval from me. I want to take that pain away from her; I want to see her anything other than the way she is now. “I just wanted to tell you, I really appreciate what you did and I’m--” she pauses to swallow and then concludes, “I wish you hadn’t gotten in trouble for it.”
“I’m fine,” I tell her, knowing how much she isn’t fine. I almost ask her to come inside. I almost ask her if she wants to, but instead I tell her to come inside and that I’d washed her clothes for her. I deliberately bring her into the game room first, so the guys can see she’s here. “You want to let off some steam and play pool or something?” Ryan asks her. I knew he would; he’s a shark. Before she can answer, I place my hand on the small of her back and tell her, “I’m only playing if we play in teams.”
I hope I never forget the way her expression changes in that moment. Where she realizes no one here wants her to be sorry.
Today
I can still feelher lips kissing down my neck as the waiter pours our coffee. The smell is rich and enticing, but it’s nothing compared to my memory of last night. I have to stare at the glass front door of the shop to keep from replaying every second with her in my bed, listening to the chimes of the bells hanging above the door as an older man wearing a newsboy cap enters, pausing to shake out his umbrella.
“The weather sucks today,” Sophie says, although her voice is sweet and airy. My eyes drift back to her as she blows across the top of her coffee. Mine’s black and hers is only a few shades darker than the cream tablecloth.
As she takes her first sip, I can’t take my eyes off of her.
“I want to see you again. Tonight.”
My words catch her off guard and she nearly spits her coffee back up. She’s frantic as she pulls the napkin from her lap to wipe her mouth.
I don’t say a damn thing, only wait for her response once she’s set down the napkin.
“Can’t we just talk about the weather and pretend like I’m not wearing the same clothes I had on last night?”
“No,” I say, and my answer is flat. I know what I want; I’m not accepting anything less. Her hesitation sends a prick of uncertainty down my spine, but I ignore it. I know she feels what’s between us just like I do. I know she does. It’s always been between us. After the four years she was mine the three years without her has simply been a waiting game. That’s all it was. Waiting. I’m done waiting now.
Sophie’s smile fades to nothing and she shifts nervously in her seat before glancing at the door.
“Is that so shocking? That I want to see you again?” I ask her, feeling a wretched twisting in my chest. The frustration is more than a hint.
Her eyes reach mine instantly. “That you would say it? …Yes.”
Anger simmers as she keeps her blue eyes on mine, prying and searching for God knows what.
“I found myself when I left.” A deep breath leaves her as she sighs and picks up her mug to take a sip. “I like the person I am now, and I don’t want to go back to what I was.”
“Who you were? What was wrong with who you were? You’ve always been perfect.” She softens at my last sentence, visibly so.
“I didn’t have a voice.” She stares into her mug as she tells me, “I didn’t know what I wanted in life.”
“What do you want now?”
“I don’t want to make the same mistakes as we did before… I know that much.”
