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I could send Rhia’s nana a postcard with some cryptic message. Rhia would work it out. But then she’d be worried about me and do something rash, like march back to Sicily and confront Tiero.
No, I can’t risk it.
I’m on dry land but never felt more at sea.
What am I going to do?
I pull my pillow against me and hug it tightly. As I lay there in the stillness of the night engulfed by darkness, I begin to feel my parents’ presence, and fresh tears leave my eyes.
Oh, Ma and Da, I miss you so, so much. Please help me, I pray.From where you are, I’m sure you can see the way.
I hear my da’s voice in my head and am grateful for the company.
Any long journey, starts with the first step. If you have to travel in the dark, even with only a small lantern, you only need to see your next step. You’ll get to your destination.
But Da, what if I don’t even have a lantern to light up my next step?
A stoirín, I hear my dad again. It’s what he always called me when I was upset. He’d hold me in his strong arms, shielding me and making me feel safe and warm. Just the memory of those moments opens the floodgates again.
Astoirín, you don’t need a lantern, you’ve got the moon and the stars.
But what if it’s cloudy, Da? How will I see then?
His low baritone laughter reverberates through my mind.Astoirín, have you forgotten that you are the brightest light of all?! Let your inner light shine and guide you. You have all the answers. Trust that they will come to you at the right time. You don’t need to know everything now. Trust, astoirín, trust that everything is working out for you.You are well looked after.
I feel the warmth of his embrace seep into my tired body. I know it’s only my imagination, but I take it anyway.
I close my eyes to soak up the comfort and courage flowing through me and drift off into a peaceful sleep, trusting that the next step will present itself.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Ella
Iwakeupsixrestful hours later with a vague plan in my head.
As I have no identification, and not enough money to get me by for long, I should go to the Irish embassy in Bern. Surely, they’ll be able to help me there and are unlikely to have ties to the Sicilian Mafia.
Though going through official channels is bound to have someone tip Gualtiero off eventually. And they would want something in return for protecting me, probably information, and I don’t have any.
And even if I had, I wouldn’t betray Tiero… I just couldn’t do it. So this plan really isn’t that great, but it’s the only one I’ve got for now.
My stomach rumbles loudly, reminding me that I have eaten little for the better part of a day.
Food, I need food… now.
Maybe once I refuel, things will become clearer, and I can think smarter.
I put my disguise back on, pack up what little belongings I have and check out. I wander the streets until I come to a cute little café with an inviting-looking courtyard right at the shore of Lake Lucerne. It’s bathed in sunlight. Vitamin D might be just what I need. If I don’t get enough sleep, this will help keep my immune system activated. I need to stay in optimum shape.
I order pancakes for breakfast with an extra serving of fresh strawberries and a cup of herbal tea. As I wait for my food to arrive, I notice an athletic-looking man slowly walking up and down the lake shore. He appears to be in his mid–thirties, is blond, and slightly larger than Tiero.
He’s moving past the café a few times, seemingly not paying me any attention, but still, I feel eyes on me. It’s making me uneasy.
Is he here for me?
Surely not. I’m really becoming paranoid. But can you blame me?
He doesn’t look like one of Tiero’s goons, but I can’t be sure.
