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“She’s right here!”
Her nostrils flare, heat pulsating between the two of them that makes me uncomfortable, as Kieran’s little sister.
Clearing his throat, Boyd excuses us, pulling me down the hall to one of the back decks off the cabin my father rented for the weekend in the Smoky Mountains.
I don’t know why he decided to come all the way down here just to celebrate me for a weekend, but I’m not complaining about the vacation, even if it has been slightly ruined.
To be honest, I think my father’s just been trying to get away from our toxic little town, and I can’t even blame him. When I moved in with Boyd three years ago, staying in King’s Trace wasn’t something we were sure we wanted.
Too many ghosts exist for us there, haunting just by nature, and I’m not sure I want to spend my adult life bound to my demons the way everyone else I know is.
I want to be free.
Boyd leans against the warped wooden railing, the backdrop of the bluish-green mountains making him look more stunning than usual.
At thirty-one, the man looks a full decade younger, the sharp angles of his jaw, his honey-blond hair, and his tattooed body combining into one disgustingly hot specimen.
If looks could kill, Boyd Kelly would be a serial offender.
Most of the time, I try not to think about the fact that he actually is.
Not that my hands are clean themselves, though.
There was no funeral for LeeAnn Kelly four years ago, no obituary, no headstone erected in her honor. It was almost as if, when my brother disposed of her bones and ashes, he erased the evidence of her entire existence, which seemed to be a good catalyst for Boyd and Riley.
It wasn’t closure, exactly, but it still gave them peace of mind, and I never questioned their feelings or lack thereof, because I knew I didn’t really get it.
For all our evil doings, my family was still pretty normal, and while we barely mourned the loss of Murphy because of the way he acted toward the end of his life, losing my mother was still the single most devastating thing we’d had to go through.
So while Boyd relishes in the fact that his mother is gone, I miss mine every single day and drink chocolate shakes every weekend with Riley, who’s become a good friend in the years since we were forced to sit together and wait to see if her brother came back for us.
But I got lucky with my mother, and they didn’t, so I reserve judgment, refusing to take on the responsibility of helping them cope in a healthy manner, when I work at my own mental health on a daily basis, sometimes still struggling with it.
That’s what therapy and medication is for.
Besides, healing isn’t linear. It’s chaotic and subjective and completely up to the individual.
Clearing his throat, Boyd grabs my hand and pulls me to his chest, wrapping his arms around my waist. “Something to tell me?”
Sighing, I shake my head, dropping my chin to his chest. “No.”
“You’re not pregnant?”
Another tear slips out, and he catches it with his thumb, one eyebrow raising in concern. I groan, frustrated with my body’s inability to control itself. “No, I’m not pregnant.”
“And does that... upset you?”
I lift my face, searching his bright hazel gaze. “I... don’t know. It’s just, I’d been moody and nauseous for the last week, and thought maybe... and then I took a test a few minutes ago and it said I’m not. So. Sorry to disappoint.”
Chuckling, he spreads his legs and fits me between them, cradling my jaw in his hands. “You could never disappoint me, princess.”
A sob slips from my lips, and I press my forehead into the base of his throat, letting him soak up my tears and my insecurities. “Why do I feel like I’ve disappointed myself?”
He strokes up and down my back as I cry, feeling stupid for even being upset but also not being able to stop. When the tears have subsided, he lifts my chin and kisses me, licking along the seam of my lips. “This is a weekend for celebrating, baby. You’re a freaking college graduate as of two days ago. Don’t let something you aren’t even sure you want ruin all that for you.”
Sniffling, I nod, but can’t find it in me to fully agree. “What if I do want it, though?”
The air charges between us, electric heat tethering me to him as his eyes darken and his grip tightens around my chin. “You want me to put a baby in you?”
