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Now she looked over at him. At some point, he’d thrown his sunglasses on his face, and now he was looking straight ahead at the water, which was visible in the distance.
“I know,” she said. “Maybe not even that long. He hasn’t said he’s staying for all the productions.”
Should she have revealed that? She should act like she didn’t care, but this was Christian, her best friend. He knew the disaster her love life had been for the past few years. If she couldn’t open up to him, she couldn’t open up to anyone.
“I know what you’re going to say,” she blurted. “I’m crushing on yet another unavailable guy.”
“That wasn’t what I was going to say,” he said.
“I told you I wasn’t going to do that anymore,” she said. “None of my long-distance relationships have ever worked out. They all go the same. They start out great, and then he begins ghosting me… Eventually, I get the ‘This isn’t going to work out’ phone call, and that’s that.”
“I’m dating someone who lives more than three hours away,” Christian pointed out. “We’re in a town with a population smaller than some high schools, and most of the residents are way older or way younger than us. You’re not going to meet Mr. Right here in town.”
Funny, since she’d met Landon in this town. On this very ranch, in fact.
“I’m wasting time, crushing on someone who’s only here a couple of months, if that.” She sighed as she took in the breathtaking scene in front of them. “Those are valuable hours that I could put toward finding someone I can spend the rest of my life with.”
“But you’d said you weren’t dating anymore,” he pointed out.
“I said I was taking a break from it. And then a gorgeous cowboy landed in front of me.”
Christian laughed. “Landed. That’s a funny way to put it.” They reached the bank, walking to the shaded area where they’d spent time as teens, talking about their dreams for the future. “You can live anywhere. You could go to Hollywood and fix hair and work in the movies like you’re doing here.”
Audrie took off her apron and set it down on the grass, then sat next to it. “I’d have the resume credit now,” she said with a laugh. “But no, I don’t see myself doing that. I don’t see myself ever leaving Corbin, actually.”
“Not even for the love of your life?”
At those words, Audrie looked over at him. She couldn’t help but remember the conversation she’d had with Landon and Rourke last night. Rourke’s theory was there was no such thing as a love of your life, and Landon hadn’t given his own theory. In fact, Landon seemed awfully quiet about his personal life in general.
She wondered if he’d ever open up to her. Maybe he didn’t open up to her because he wasn’t interested in her the way she was interested in him. But the way he looked at her sometimes, it would be hard to believe that.
“Do you think there’s such a thing?” Audrie asked, staring out over the water.
Christian had taken the seat next to her and was now leaning forward, pulling at blades of grass like he used to do as a teen. He’d always had a hard time sitting still for long.
“Such a thing as what?” Christian asked.
“The love of your life. Landon’s brother was saying last night that there’s no such thing. That you pick a suitable mate from the limited choices you have around you. That there’s any number of people who would be a good fit.”
Christian sat up straight, still looking out at the water. “That’s kind of a cynical way of looking at things, isn’t it?”
“I guess but maybe cynical is what we need sometimes. It helps keep us rational.”
Audrie didn’t know where all this was coming from. She’d always been a hopeless romantic. But her attraction to Landon had brought up fears she’d long kept buried.
“I’ve been cynical a long time,” Christian said quietly. “After Melissa died, all I could think about was what’s the point in trying to build a life with someone, since we’re all going to die anyway.”
Audrie didn’t so much as breathe as she waited for Christian to say more. It’d been three years since Melissa died, and aside from a few conversations in the weeks following her death, they didn’t talk about her. Not like this. He’d never opened up to her about his wife’s death.
“I know things are still new with Poppy,” he said. “But I can see, in a way, what Landon’s brother meant. Yes, there are probably multiple people we could build a life with out there. But how often do you have that strong connection with someone? Someone who makes you feel things you didn’t think possible?”
Audrie couldn’t help but think of Landon as Christian said those words. There was something she felt when she was with Landon. She felt at peace. Like everything was exactly as it should be.
“That’s what Poppy is for me,” he said. “It takes nothing away from what I felt for Melissa, but it’s different. Now I’m older and wiser. I’m not the same person I was when I fell in love before. There’s something I bring to this relationship that makes it even better than anything I’ve ever had.” He looked over at her. “So, yeah, maybe she is the love of my life.”
“Maybe we can have more than one love,” she said.
Audrie looked over at him then and gave him a tentative smile. She was happy for him. She truly was. She had no hope that she’d find what he’d found with Poppy, but when Christian mentioned that he felt things he hadn’t felt before, it had struck a nerve. Yes, that was how she felt.
