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Murphy
It’s long past midnight when I watch another minute click by on the clock. I’ve held Sabrina in my arms for hours, thinking about life and how fucked up it can be. Jamie was a good guy, loved his family, loved his girl, loved his team. He always took being one of the captains to heart. He’d waited years to finally ask Charlotte to marry him, and just a few days later, they’re both gone.
What kind of fucked up world do we live in?
Sabrina’s been sleeping with her head resting over my heart all night. Before she drifted off, she told me she could hear it beating. I wonder if that comforted her as much as feeling her soft breath on my skin has comforted me. She’s okay. She’s alive and in my arms. And tonight, that’s enough.
I’ve got nothing to offer this girl, not yet anyway. But I will one day. I’ll wait, but not patiently and not forever. I’m never gonna make fun of Brady again. If I thought Sabrina would move in here, I’d ask her tomorrow.
My fingers dance over the smooth skin of her bare back as I imagine our life together. I think about her pregnant with our babies and the terrifying feelings I had months ago aren’t there. There’s nothing but peace.
I picture our home, our happiness, and it gives me hope.
I don’t picture a place or a thing. I picture Sabrina.
She’s my home.
Rocky puts his paws up on the side of the bed and scratches. I guess he’s got to go out. Shit. I think she’s got to go out. I’ve gotta remember that Rocky’s a girl. Why the hell did Jamie get a girl dog?
Removing myself as gently as I can, I manage to get up without waking Sabrina. I pull the comforter up, draping it over her body, and look at this beautiful woman, sleeping so peacefully in my bed, those long lashes fanning her pretty face...
Rocky paws at my leg then sits down and wags her tail, tapping it impatiently against the floor. “Alright, girl. I’ve got you. Let’s go out.”
Those are the magic words because she makes a beeline to my bedroom door and looks at me as if to say, “You can hurry up now.”
Rocky doesn’t take long to do her thing outside before racing back to the door. I don’t blame her. I can see my breath in front of my face as the cool night air reminds me it’s not summer anymore and November is closing in on us. As soon as I crack the door open, she races by me to get back inside the warm house and runs to the kitchen island where Bash is sitting.
Watching a bulldog run is pretty fucking funny. Her short little legs don’t look like they’re big enough to support her round body. Rocky curls up next to Bash and rests her head on his sock-covered foot.
“Hey, you little traitor. I’m the one that got out of a warm bed and took you outside.”
Her head lifts for a moment as she glances my way before turning back to Bash and settling in.
He drops his hand and scratches behind her ears while Brady places three shot glasses on the counter. “You guys couldn’t sleep either?”
Bash shakes his head. “I talked to Dixon earlier. Jamie’s parents are having him flown home as soon as they can.”
Brady turns back around with a bottle of Jack Daniels and pours three shots. He pushes one to Bash and one to me, then lifts his in front of us. “To Jamie.”
Bash and I raise our glasses. “To Jamie.”
“I haven’t really slept, just been staring at Nat all night.” Brady refills the shots.
I nod. “Yeah, man. I know the feeling.”
“It’s just so fucked up.” Bash downs his second shot.
I throw back my shot and push my glass toward Brady. We’re all going to regret this at practice tomorrow, but none of us cares right now. “Bash, man, how are you going to deal with this kind of shit all the time when you’re a hotshot doctor?”
“I don’t know. I just know I need to even out the scales. It’s fucked up, but I figure if I can save lives, it will help offset all the lives my pops has ruined.”
Brady refills the three glasses. We lift them. “Brothers.”
Bash and I repeat, “Brothers.”
The glasses get pushed back and refilled again. “Brady, man, when did you know Nattie was it for you?”
Bash looks at me like I just pissed in his Cheerios. “Oh, come on. This is what we’re gonna talk about now? Should I go get you guys a box of tampons too? What the fuck?” He fills his glass and drinks. “Can we not tonight?”
