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Maybe time away is the best thing I could get now, to clear my head and figure out what the hell I’m doing.
Carys pops her head back outside, smiling nervously. “Hey, we’re going to lunch. Wanna come?”
“Sorry. I’ve got to get back. We’re training soon.” That’s a lie. We’ve got this week and the next off before the team starts training again. But she doesn’t need to know that. I need space before I do something I can’t take back. “I’ll call you later. Make sure you lock that door behind me.” Without thinking about it, I kiss the top of her head and walk away, but not before I catch the look of disappointment on her face.
This is not how today was supposed to go.
“Thanks, Mom. I appreciate it.”I’m snuggled in my favorite chair, with my laptop resting on my lap, and my mom’s beautiful face smiling at me through the screen. She and I both have chestnut-brown hair with natural red highlights. My brother, Aiden, however, is a full-blown ginger.
I waited to FaceTime with her tonight until after Emerson left to spend another night at Linc’s house. In the five nights since the party last weekend, she’s slept here precisely one time. Sunday. It’s crazy to see her like this. When she’s actually here, she’s talking about him. I’m not sure if she’s in love, lust, or completely infatuated.
And since I didn’t want any distractions during this video call, it was easier to wait for her to leave before calling. I wasn’t expecting my mother to accept this new living arrangement as easily as she has. She and Aiden like to treat me like the baby of the family. Which I guess I am. Or at least I was until Callen was born. She says Aiden and I will always be her babies, but I think that myth was debunked when my brother walked in on her and Coach naked in the kitchen. Poor guy. We’ll never let him live that down.
But I also think my time away this year helped her see that I’m not a child anymore.
At least I hope so.
“Oh, honey. You’re a smart woman with a good head on your shoulders. Did you really think I’d have a problem with you moving in with Emerson’s brother? I trust you. And I miss you so much. Just a few more weeks until I get to see you again.” The smile on her face puts my nerves at ease.
My stepfather, Coach, sits down next to my mother at their kitchen table with a wide smile on his face and his black Philadelphia Kings polo shirt on, like a uniform he always wears.
“Hey, kiddo. How are you doing?” Coach is a good-looking older man with dark hair and darker blue eyes. He could easily be confused for someone half his age if not for some salt-and-pepper tendrils starting to show around his temples. My oldest stepbrother, Declan, looks like him. Cooper takes after their mother with his blond hair and baby blues I get lost in at night when I close my eyes.
“I’m good, Coach. Finals are done. I’ve got a week off before summer classes start.” Coach slid easily into the position of stepfather and has been more of a dad to me in the few short years since he and my mom moved in together than I’ve ever had. My bio-dad left when I was a baby. I barely remember him. But Coach has never awkwardly tried to fill that void. Instead, he’s treated me exactly the same as his own daughter, and it happened naturally.
He’s a good man. Not my father but someone I love like one.
How disappointed would he be in me if he knew all the naughty things I’d like to do with his son? Things I know will take our family dynamic and spin it like an F5 tornado. What the hell does that say about me?
“So you’re moving in with boys?” He makes it sound like we’re ten years old, but a smile tugs at my lips anyway.
“Yeah, Coach. Emerson and I are moving in with her brother and his friend, Theo. They’re the guys from the band I’ve been singing with. I’ve told you about them.” I adjust my MacBook on my lap, then add, “They’re good guys. I think you’d like them.”
“Uh-huh.” He looks at me with less-than-convinced eyes. “Just remember that no man will ever be good enough for you, kiddo. And keep your bedroom door locked.” He pauses for a moment, then adds, “And maybe a baseball bat under your bed.”
Mom smacks his arm. “Leave her alone, Joe.”
He drags Mom over onto his lap, and I look away before they start kissing. Wanting her to be happy and having to witness them kissing are two completely separate things, and we’ve all seen enough of their PDA to last ten lifetimes. “Okay, you two. I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”
“Love you too, honey.”
I close my laptop and sigh. Okay, that was way less painful than I thought it would be.
It’s time to start packing up my things.
I’ve spent the last nine months of my life here. It hasn’t always been easy being three thousand miles away from everyone and everything I know and love, but it was the right move.
I think I’m going to look back on this as the year I figured out who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do. Here’s hoping it doesn’t take me another year to figure out my next steps.
* * *
A few hours later, my phone rings with an incoming text from Emerson.
Em:Linc said the team would help us move tomorrow.
Carys:The team? Like the whole team?
Em:Umm... yeah. I guess.
