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I nodded. “I wanted to inform you of my plans, because I owe you that much, and because I’ll need your help, even more than what you already offer me. Us.”
Rue tilted her head, her long gray braid moving with it. “What is going on?”
I told her about my plan and asked, “Could you watch over my siblings while I’m away? Especially Minsi?”
Rue pressed her lips tight. I knew she wanted to argue with me, but nothing she or anyone else could say would change my mind. “Of course I will. Just … please, come back.”
“I will,” I said automatically.
She rested her hand on my arm. “I know how it is to lose your mate, Shane. The constant pain inside your chest. The renewed grief when you wake up in the middle of the night and suddenly remember they are gone. The nonexistent will to live. But you’re not just another wolf in our pack. You’re our alpha. You need to be strong for all of us, for Tyren and Minsi too. Tyren is too young to become alpha, and Minsi …” She sighed. “Minsi needs you more than anyone else.”
I nodded. I didn’t want to live on, but I had to do it. “Thanks.”
After a pat on my arm, Rue returned to the kids. I felt torn about walking up to Minsi and giving her a hug before leaving, but what if I did that and she realized something was wrong? She was alone, but she was peaceful. I didn’t want to disturb that peace.
On my way back to my house, I grabbed my phone and texted Dom.
Where are you?
Finishing up training. Why?
I started typing my answer. I didn’t want to face him or argue about my choice. I wanted him to read my response and just follow my orders.
“Shane.”
I stopped walking, looking in the direction of the voice.
Lucille walked out of her house and jogged to me. The sun reflected off her blond hair, and for a moment, her beauty struck me. It was a shame she didn’t seem able to move on from our past relationship. She really deserved to find a mate and be happy with him.
“What is it?” I asked, pocketing my phone again.
“Nothing.” She shrugged as she fell into step with me. “I just … saw you and wanted to talk to you. How are you?”
“Good.” Another automatic answer and a complete lie.
She cocked her head to the side. “Shane, I’ve known you since we were little kids. You can’t lie to me.”
I shook my head. “What do you want me to say, Lucille? I’ve been feeling wretched and in agony every second of every day since Raika’s been gone. Is that what you want to hear?”
“If that’s the truth, then yes.”
A knot formed between my brows. “No one else needs to live in misery with me.”
“Shane, we’re all living in misery. Everyone here has lost loved ones, lived as slaves, and then lost our home. We’re now forced to shelter with vampires. Besides, Raika made her mark on us. Everyone misses her.”
A lump rose to my throat.
Finally, after a week of forcing myself to get up in the mornings, to breathe and keep going, I had a reason to live, even if brief: I was going to find Paimon and I was going to kill the bastard.
And I was going to make him suffer.
I wanted to focus on that and only that because it was better to hang on to my anger than my sorrow.
“I appreciate the concern, Lucille, but I’m fine.” I halted in front of my house. “You should go.”
Lucille’s face fell. “Of course.” Without another word, she left. I was about to head inside my house when I caught sight of Dom running this way.
For a moment, I froze. What was wrong?
