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“Noah,” I said quietly, pausing. “Whatever it is, talk to me.”
He didn’t pull away from me, but when his eyes met mine, they were fire, rage, and sadness. Fear perhaps, but it was distant.
“After the fire was spotted the other night, we sent two of our spies toward the border to see what was going on. Apparently, they didn’t even have to go that far before catching a Seelie and taking her prisoner.”
So much had happened that I’d barely remembered the war, the fire I’d seen and watched through Nicole’s bedroom window. I frowned. “A soldier?”
He shook his head, pulling his hand away from mine and standing over by my window. “Commoner, it would seem. She claims that the border towns have fallen. If that’s true, we have no way to corroborate what she said and trust the answer we’d receive from the townspeople.”
“Fallen?” My voice was a whisper, like the air had turned dry and made me hoarse.
War was new to me, but I wasn’t stupid. Unseelie towns falling wasn’t good. This war seemed different, too. It hadn’t reached us yet, hadn’t impacted us. Being a lady’s maid hadn’t helped me be in the know about all of this. Which meant Noah had been dealing with it alone.
Noah leaned back against the very small window ledge. “I’m being sent to the border town to gather more information.”
“You?” I jumped up from the bed. “With others?”
He shook his head. “Only a few additional soldiers. Too many of us would draw attention we don’t need.”
“You’re the prince. What if it’s an ambush, or a trap? They just happened across this commoner saying the towns have fallen, and that’s that? You get sent? What if you’re taken, Noah? This is dangerous for you.”
“For…us.” He cocked his eyebrow.
Us. I hadn’t even thought about that until now. As his feeder, I’d be going with him. I was somewhat relieved he wouldn’t be alone, but what help would I truly offer in an outnumbered situation? I’d been training less than half a year.
“I’m not worried about me. Unseelie will survive without me. But you—" I stopped.
Noah was watching me carefully. “I’m a warrior, Cora. This is normal. This is our way of life. I’ve been raised for this since I could walk and hold a sword at the same time. Do you think I’m concerned about going? Upset I’m being sent?”
“Of course you are. You’ve been off since you came in.”
Noah rubbed at his face, running his hands behind his neck and shaking his head. “You have to come with me.”
“I know that.” I walked closer to him. With the uncomfortableness between the two of us lately, it felt strange to try to reach out and comfort him in any way, or even stand too close to him. He wasn’t looking at me again, and I couldn’t understand if he didn’t want to be around me that badly or if Vanessa had raised a stink somehow.
Reaching my hand forward slowly, I almost touched his arm but pulled back, not sure what he was most upset about.
He saw the movement, watched my hand as it pulled in closer to me. “You’re in danger because of being my feeder. If it is an ambush, I’ll be dragging you into it, Cora. I’m okay with what happens to me, but…” he stammered, “I don’t think I can handle…if something were to happen—"
“You’re worried about me?” I asked, shocked that he’d given it a second thought.
He pushed off from the window. “You act as though that’s so hard to believe. Is that how you think of me?”
My eyes widened at his sudden turn of tone. “Noah, this is what I’m here for. It’s part of my role as your feeder. That’s been hammered into me since I arrived. I wouldn’t think that I’d be the concern here.”
He blinked a few times, staring at me in some sort of angry horror. Like I’d slapped him in the face with what I’d said.
“Well, I won’t worry about you then, I guess. Silly me for thinking about my friend.”
The tone was cheeky enough where I wanted to lash out now. Retaliate. He was hurt from what I said? How about how he’d been acting?
“We leave at sunrise. Prepare your things, and take time to visit Nicole if you wish. We aren’t marching into battle, but since this is unknown, I’d understand if you wanted time with someone you care about.”
Noah marched across the room and slammed my door before I had time to say anything further.
The shock from trying to understand that he’d been so weird in here because he’d been worried about me coming with him still wasn’t sinking in. Or making sense.
And my response reminding him that I was told this is what it was like was even stranger.
