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Being with her erases the pain, and I will move heaven and hell to protect her. I will figure out another way to save Zoey, but I can’t give her to Popov.
She is mine.
She always has been.
Unable to stop the avalanche of tears, I hug the journal to my chest and sob silently. I wish I’d known this then, because now, all I can do is remember those memories and clutch onto them tightly. Saint knew I would read this when he gave me his journal. He wanted me to know just in case…
A breath catches in my throat at the thought.
If something were to happen, use this to save yourself.
That’s what he told me. I now know it was a double-edged sword. Knowing he feels this way about me, that he’s felt this way for so long, has me quickly wiping away my tears. I will save us both because everything I just read…I want to hear them pass through those lips I’ve come to love to kiss and intend to kiss for the rest of my life.
I spring from the mattress and rush into the walk-in closet, hunting through the endless garments I’ve never cared anything for. But now, they will help me get out of here. Alek wants to dress me up like a prized pig and parade me around to his friends, and thus far, I’ve fought him. But no more. As Saint said, to beat my enemy, I need to become them, and what better way for that to happen than to dress up like the doll Alek wants me to be.
I shower, ensuring to use the lavish body gels and lotions Alek has provided for me. Once I’m scrubbed clean, I dry off and begin the laborious chore of getting ready. I lather my skin in cream and perfume before slipping into a sheer black bra and matching thong.
Next, I work on my hair and makeup, putting as much care and effort as I would if getting ready for a show. Usually, I would have endless makeup artists and stylists on hand, but not now. There is only me, and that’s okay because to survive this, that’s the only person I can rely on.
It takes me over an hour, but once I pull back from the mirror and look at my reflection, it was time well spent. With the shorter hairstyle, there isn’t much I could do other than sweep my bangs to the side and give a little body to the length. However, the ribbon headband encrusted with rhinestones and pearls adds to the look, and when adjusted in just the right way, it appears I’m wearing a crown, which is why I chose it. To pull this off, I have to act like a fucking queen.
My makeup is smoky, and I’ve tinged my cheeks a subtle rose. My lips are painted a bright blood red, which matches the dress I’ve chosen to wear. I’ve opted for one shorter than anything I’ve worn around Alek.
Leave a trail for a scavenger, and he will follow.Alek said that when referring to Kenny, and I intend to do exactly that but for Alek.
Alek wants me to submit to him and doing so will give me the upper hand. It’s clear Alek believes he has feelings for me. One only has to look at what he did to Kenny, to Zoey for me, so I will play him at his own game.
Alek doesn’t trust me. He believes with Saint out of the picture, I will succumb to his “charms” like all the other women before me. So I will behave how he wants me to, like the docile little lamb he paid a quarter of a million for.
And when he lowers his guard, because hewill, I will strike. To get what I want, I will have to play dirty and do things I may not want to do, but I refuse to end up like Zoey—a shell of the woman I once was. This is the only way I can ensure I get what I want, and that’s my freedom.
Taking a final look at myself in the mirror, I slip into my heels and hold my head high. Deciding to leave the switchblade under my pillow, I pretend I’m on the runway as I strut out into the hallway on the hunt for Alek. No surprise a guard stands at my door, but that will soon change. I’ll make sure of it.
“Where’s Alek?” I ask the man in the most innocent voice I can muster.
He grunts in response before gesturing with his head that I’m to follow. That’s all I seem to be doing of late but not for much longer. He leads me through this labyrinth while I scope out every door, every corner we turn because I will need to know these halls like the back of my hand. The trapdoor in the kitchen is still my best way out, but I have to bide my time.
We walk up the grand staircase and turn left toward an area that has been out of bounds until now. I’ve always wondered what was up here because we’ve always turned right when I was escorted here. The first thing that strikes me is how quiet it is. There aren’t as many rooms as there are downstairs.
When we get to a double door at the end of the hall, my guard grunts once again. I assume that’s to indicate Alek is inside. I’m clueless to what I’m about to face, but remembering my game plan, I knock softly.
Alek says something in Russian, which I’m guessing means enter because the man opens the door for me. He then leaves me alone to face the devil himself.
Alek sits behind a large desk, typing away on a computer without lifting his head. I close the door behind me and wait for him to speak first. When he finally lifts his eyes, I quash down my elation because it’s evident my plan has worked.
He hisses in a deep breath through his teeth as he leans back in his black leather chair. He devours me from head to toe, his tongue sweeping out to lick his bottom lip. This is the first time he’s seen me dolled up, and judging by the way he gawks at my breasts, it’s safe to say he likes what he sees.
“H-hello.” He clears his throat while I focus on the task at hand.
“Hi. I hope you don’t mind me coming in here. I was lonely.”
When he raises a brow, I wonder if maybe I’ve gone too far, and he can see through my ruse. But when he shakes his head and gestures with his hand that I’m to come closer, my worries subside. “I’m sorry I haven’t come to see you. I’ve been busy with work, and I figured you needed some time to…”
Grieve? Calm down? Stop envisioning him on fire?
“I understand,” I settle on as I walk toward him. A good submissive would kneel, but I don’t want to rouse suspicion. So I stop on the side of his desk.
The perfume I applied generously has worked a charm because he sniffs the air and smiles. “You look absolutely breathtaking. That dress was made for you.” I don’t know if he means that literally because my wardrobe is creepily donned with clothes in exactly my size.
