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“How do you always make such complete sense?”
Her musical laugh makes me smile. I’ve missed it. “Because I’m a mom, and because I was your age once and learned from a lot of mistakes. Don’t forget that, honey.”
“Thanks, mom. I miss you.”
“Miss you too, Ellie. Come visit soon, okay?”
“I will.”
“Call me if you need to talk. I’m always here, no matter what.”
Tears prick the backs of my eyes and I swallow the lump in my throat. “I will. Love you.”
“Love you more.”
“Tell dad I say hi.”
“I will. Bye, honey.”
“Bye.”
A sudden wave of nostalgia hits me, and I wish I could visit my parents. I’ve only gotten to fly down to Florida for a couple holidays since they retired a few years ago, and I miss having them close.
For the rest of my night, I shove all thoughts of men out of my head and spend the evening doing a little self-care. I deep condition my hair, do a face mask, put on my most comfy pajamas, and lay out in front of the TV after making myself a delicious dinner. Spaghetti and meatballs with garlic bread and wine. A little comfort food to ease my weary mind.
Chapter 14
Tyler asked me to meet him at his place tonight for a surprise, and I’ve been coaching myself all day on how to not give in to him, and how to tell him that I have a date tomorrow night…
This morning, as I was organizing the cases in the café, one of Ryan’s deputies came in for donuts, and we got to talking. That then led to him asking me out, and with the conversation I had with my mom last night ringing in my head, I said yes.
Caleb seems nice enough, though, and I’m not ashamed to admit I’m a woman who likes a man in uniform. And he lookedgoodin his.
I just hope he didn’t tell Ryan when he got back to the station, because I don’t need him calling his brother to tell him. Although, if Tyler already knew, he probably wouldn’t have asked me over. I think.
I’ve been trying to convince myself all day that this is what I need, but regret is starting to creep in.
When he asked me out, Meghan hadn’t arrived yet and Courtney was busy in the kitchen, so no one knows. I don’t need any lectures on my choices right now.
After taking a quick shower, I let my hair out of its bun, and it falls in a wave down my back. I reapply my makeup, but keep it light, and throw on my favorite pair of ripped jeans and a light sweater. The evenings have been slowly cooling off now that it’s the middle of September, and it’s even cooler at Tyler’s with the breeze blowing off the water.
The drive to his house is too short to rid me of my nerves, and in fact, by the time I park, my stomach is in one giant knot.
I almost chicken out and turn around, but then Tyler steps out onto the porch and leans against the doorframe, smiling at me – the knot in stomach loosening just a little. He’s so damn handsome, and the fact that that smile is for me, astounds me.
I return his smile with automatic ease, and a wave of guilt hits me. Why do I feel like I’m cheating on him when we’re not even together? And I haven’t even done anything yet…
Yet, though, being the operative word.
Although, all I did was say yes to a date.
That’s it.
That’s all.
Taking a deep breath, I get out of my car and walk towards him, his eyes never leaving mine. Each step closer fills a hole in my chest I didn’t know was there until the moment I’m right in front of him. He reaches for me, and my chest feels so full, it might burst.
I don’t know this feeling.
