Page 48 of When We Lose


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I can’t breathe for a few moments while waiting to see if she’s buying my story.

It’s so twisted and sounds so fake that I’d be surprised if she did.

“He pays you not to fall in love with him…” she deadpans.

It sounds beyond ridiculous, and Giana is not a fool, but I have to stick with it. So I keep my face straight, bite my lip, crinkle my nose, and nod.

The next few seconds feel like an eternity.

“Why would he do that?” she asks, puzzled.

I shrug, secretly happy.

That is a much better way to react than laughing in my face.

“He wanted you to fall in love with him and came up with this ridiculous bet to lure you in…” she says, and I want to kiss her cheek in response.

I’m so grateful for her pretending that my story makes the slightest sense. That doesn’t mean I won’t need to come clean at some point in the future.

I need to tell her everything. Not having someone to talk to about this story starts to take a toll on me.

“Maybe…” I say in response to her assumption.

She tips her gaze down, collects the rest of her sandwich, and resumes eating.

“Is it working?” she asks.

My focus sharpens quickly.

“So far…? Yes. I think it does.”

The reality is… I have no idea.

Things have changed so many times, and reality proved me wrong when I was certain about something.

“I’m not asking you about the money,” she says. “It must be a huge amount of moolah, or you wouldn’t spend it like you won the lottery.”

“It’s enough.”

She ponders something else.

“Did you buy another car?”

“I’m still looking. Plus, I need to fix my credit score first.”

That’s something convenient to say.

I do plan to pay off all my debt next week. I could’ve done it earlier, but I didn’t have time to think about it.

Then I’ll look for a new car. I still don’t know what kind of car I want to buy.

What I do know is that I’ll pay cash.

I know I’m behind and I need to take care of it, but I’m getting there. It will only take an afternoon.

I think I need to pinch myself.

It’s so hard to believe I’m talking about my finances.

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