Page 72 of When We Lose


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No. Not at all.

So Kai is jealous. Why would Kai be jealous? He showed that woman more attention than he had shown me.

Had he cared about me, he would’ve stopped his cryptic communication and given me the whole scoop.

It would’ve looked bad either way.

He would’ve told me to go home and wait for him while he attended to social obligations.

If that’s what this is.

Why would I tell him why I spent time at the bar?

I didn’t have a particular reason.

I just felt down.

“It doesn’t matter why I was there,” I say, pulling my phone out of my bag and swiping the screen with my thumb before scrolling for a taxi app.

The moment of silence prolongs, his frustration only mounting, I suspect.

I’m as frustrated as he is, but having this conversation on the street, when he needs to go back to his dinner, and I have to find a taxi and go home, is not a winning scenario.

He needs to leave.

“Go,” I say. “ I can’t talk to you right now,” I murmur, typing in my information.

I look up to check the street number.

He glances away at the limousine stationed in front of the hotel, its engine still running.

Before he has the chance to say a word, I move away from him, heading to Fifth Avenue. I have a better chance to find a cab at La Plaza.

“Go to my place,” he says, making me stop again and turn around.

He also checks something on his phone and starts typing.

He must be messaging the driver as the limousine sets itself in motion, closing the space between us.

It suddenly dawns on me that his apartment is minutes away, and he has a new set of clothes on.

He must’ve gone there, changed his clothes, and picked up the woman. Where did he pick her up? Was it at the airport? Has he invited her to his place? Were the two of them coming from his apartment?

I’ve never in my life felt more jealous than I am right now. I can’t unlock my jaw to speak. What is this story with that woman? And all these men? And Cardenas?

My thoughts are so filthy and disgusting; I have a hard time sorting through them.

This can’t be that. It’s business. It must be business. But how come she is the only woman in their circle?

No matter how many times I swallow, I can’t push down the lump lodged in my throat and can’t stop the inane thoughts from spinning around in my head.

Him and his taste in orgies.

Him and his attraction to dark-haired women.

Him and his moods.

Do I know Kai?

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