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I open my mouth to answer him, but I can't reply. I can’t speak. My throat is so dry. Every sound I make sounds gargled and strangled, so I clamp my mouth shut.
He shakes his head, the fog whirling around him as he moves. I think he’s ashamed, though I can’t tell how I know that. What Idoknow is that this is real. Just like I know we’re having this conversation.
I don't feel alone anymore. He's here with me, for me. He was here for me before anybody else was.
Malon.
“Stupid question,“ he says softly. “I shouldn’t have asked you. I'm sorry.“
“No, it's okay. You didn't do anything wrong.“ I think it, but definitely don't say it because my throat aches and speaking hurts.
He walks to the side of my bed, and I can feel the relief from him, as palpable as the heat rolling off his skin. I’m worried that, if I open my eyes, he’s not going to be here anymore. I don’t want him to leave. I want him to stay here, to keep me company, to keep me awake.
“You're going to be okay,“ he says. It feels like a whisper.
“How do you know?“ I ask, once again just by thinking it. He seems to be able to read my mind, and I'm going to take advantage of that if I can.
“Because I know,“ he replies. Maybe it’s my imagination, but I think I hear some doubt in his voice. “Because you're resilient. Because you have to get better.“
“You don’t know me.“
He laughs, as if I’ve just told him the world’s funniest joke. It doesn’t feel funny to me, but hey, what the fuck do I know? “I know you so well,“ he replies. “Trine, people are counting on you to get better. I'm counting on you to get better.“
This suddenly feels so unfair. And weird. Why does he want me to get better before I even know who he is?
“But I don't even know your name,“ I say—no, think—at him. I don’t really know his name, just the therapist who looks like him. For all I know, this guy is someone totally different.
Or maybe his identical twin. God, who knows?
He laughs again, a little more quietly that time. As if this was banter, and the two of us were flirting, and I wasn’t in a hospital bed, and he didn’t only exist in my head. “But Trine, you can know everything about me. All you have to do is ask.“
MISHA
We’re standing outside Trine’s hospital room, silent after talking through what happened to her.
She’s not in the ICU, and she’s no longer in the ER, but they’re keeping her for observation just in case. The hospital is very nice, and I’m glad she’s somewhere comfortable.
But other than word from the doctor and her mother, who has gone to get coffee with her husband, we haven’t seen Trine at all. And after that awful visual of her in the car, with vomit and blood all over the front of her body, I really want to see her.
I need to see her. I need to make sure that she’s okay.
Especially because I feel like, in a way, we did this to her.
Father Salinas has been praying since we got here. It feels like this is the first time he’s stopped praying, since Rei approached us to tell us the news he heard from her doctor.
“So she's going to be okay?“ Salinas asks.
“Yeah,“ Woods replies, crossing his arms over his chest. His glasses are fogged up and his normally immaculate black hair is messy. We probably all look like shit. He takes his glasses off and wipes the lenses on his orange bomber jacket. “She’s awake, she’s responsive, but there are probably some soft tissue injuries that might require medication and maybe even physical therapy. Aside from all the cuts and bruises. She’s not bleeding internally or anything, they checked. From the way the crash looked, she got lucky.“
Salinas and I both nod. She did get lucky. She didn’tlooklucky, so I’m really glad she’s okay. The thought that something else might’ve happened…it makes my stomach twist. I don’t even want to think about it.
“The reason they’re keeping her overnight is because they’re checking for head injuries,“ Woods continues, putting his glasses back on and raking his fingers through his hair. “They need to do tests. They need to keep her under observation for a bit.“
“We can sleep here,“ I say, shrugging my shoulders. “We’ve slept in worse places.“
We’ve been in the hospital for what seemed like hours, and before this, there wasn't any news; we were just waiting for the doctor to come out and talk to us.
There was a lot of pacing, a lot of concerned looks, but it wasn’t until about two or three hours into being here that we got any news. The doctor hadn't talked to us first, of course, because she needed to talk to Trine’s mother. But after her mother brought Rei along with her to speak to the emergency doctor, he definitely looked like he was feeling a bit better. The information had most likely helped him.
