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But the thing she really missed was talking about Billy. Of course, it wasn’t their fault – they hadn’t really known him. In fact, Susie had never even met him. Flora looked down at her feet, watching the pebbles shift as her feet sank into the ground with every step.
‘… And then, you won’t believe what she said.’ Tilda’s voice took on a dramatic edge.
‘What?’ cried Susie.
‘She said, and I quote, “That’s ridiculous. Ivo would never bite anyone.”’
‘But he’s the original biter!’ Susie rolled her eyes.
‘Exactly.’ Tilda shrugged. ‘I mean, I always assume my kids are guilty unless proven innocent.’ She laughed.
Flora laughed too, a beat behind the others. She knew they were trying to distract her with the small stuff, and she loved them for it. But however much she tried to be fully present, she just couldn’t quite get there.
Tilda broke the brief silence. ‘Hey, Flo, how’s the shop going?’
‘Good, I think. Trade is picking up now. I should be working today but Johnny told me to have the day off.’
Susie squeezed Flora’s arm. ‘You should. After this why don’t you go home and put your feet up with a good book? I’d do anything to have an excuse to have a day off… Oh God, I’m sorry. That’s really insensitive, isn’t it?’
‘It’s fine, really.’ Flora smiled gently at her worried friend. ‘Please don’t think you’re saying the wrong thing, ever. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without you two. You’ve both been so amazing. I mean, Johnny has too, of course, but I can’t expect him to fix everything. And as for my parents…’ Flora let out a small laugh.
‘What’s happened?’ Tilda had always thought of Flora’s parents as the perfect happily married older couple. She knew things had been tough for them recently but that was to be expected.
‘Well, nothing really. But that’s the point. They don’t really talk about it. About Billy. Or to each other, for that matter, about anything. I’ve started to find excuses not to visit or put them off coming to see us because – and I feel terrible for saying this – I just can’t face it. It makes me so sad. Mum has just shut Dad out. And just before… I saw something I really wish I hadn’t seen.’
Tilda and Susie both looked at Flora.
‘What?’ whispered Tilda.
‘I saw my father at the station. He was with someone and it wasn’t my mother.’
‘Really?’ Tilda’s eyes practically popped out of her head. ‘But your father seems like the last person on earth who’d ever be unfaithful!’
Flora shrugged. ‘I thought so too. I tried to tell myself it wasn’t anything but I know what I saw. They definitely weren’t just friends.’
‘Oh, no, Flora, I’m so sorry. Have you asked him about it? It could have been perfectly innocent?’ Susie gently put her hand on Flora’s shoulder.
‘Well, he knows I saw him, but I haven’t really talked to him about it properly. I’m too terrified of the fallout. I mean, it would absolutely crush Mum if she knew. She couldn’t deal with that on top of everything else.’
Susie felt her stomach tighten. Julian had always assumed she didn’t know about his affair, but the truth was she’d always known. ‘Are you sure it’s still going on? It might change now, given what’s happened.’ Susie hoped this didn’t sound too brutal.
‘I just need to think about it – what to do, I mean. I’d hoped I could try to forget it, but I can’t even bring myself to talk to him properly. It’s like he’s making me keep a dreadful secret. If Billy were here…’ Flora looked out towards the horizon. She felt completely hollowed out.
‘Have you told Johnny?’ asked Tilda.
‘No, I’ve just sort of buried it for now. I can’t even… Anyway, I think Johnny’s planning something. For me, I mean. Like a surprise. The last thing he needs is to worry about my parents, too.’
‘Really? What’s the surprise?’ said Susie.
‘I think he’s planning a long weekend away.’
‘Ooh, how lovely. Any idea where?’ Tilda sounded genuinely excited on Flora’s behalf.
But Flora didn’t really feel anything, neither excited nor bothered. Just totally indifferent.
‘Venice, I think. I saw his laptop open on the kitchen table last week. I went there years ago with my parents. I remember it so well. It was the Venice Biennale, not that we knew that when we turned up. The whole place was packed, flags everywhere, great art installations sticking out of the Grand Canal. All quite bonkers, but amazing to see. Johnny’s obviously already done a 360-degree virtual walking tour of the city according to the YouTube video he was watching when I came into the kitchen yesterday. He’s nothing if not thorough in his research.’
‘Oh, you have to love him for that. How thoughtful!’ Susie grinned.
