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“Hearing her say those words brought it back to me. That night. When you told me I was the love of your life, but that you were not mine. You begged me to live.
“Well, I think you were wrong. You were the love of my life – my first love. But maybe you’re not my last. Maybe I’m meant to love someone else,” she says, squeezing my hand so hard I begin to lose circulation to my fingers. But I don’t care. I don’t move. I barely breathe.
“There is enough room in my heart for two. There’s you, Josh. My first love. The man who taught me just how truly wonderful love can be,” she says, before glancing at me. “And then there’s Nick. My last love. The man I’m supposed to spend the rest of my days with.” She chuckles, sniffling her nose and frantically wiping at tears with her left hand.
I turn her to face me.
“That is, if I didn’t already fuck it up when I ran away from him,” she says, her green eyes so bright in the moonlight.
“You didn’t fuck it up. Actually, I was here telling Josh how badly I fucked it up,” I say, catching a few tears with the pads of my thumbs.
“No,” she says, anxiously shaking her head. “You spoke the truth, right?”
I nod.
“Then you didn’t fuck anything up. I did,” she insists.
“No, honey, you didn’t. You were scared. I know that. But you don’t have to be afraid anymore. You don’t have to run from me. I want to help you. I want to stand with you when times get tough. I want to be your friend and your lover, who carries the burden when it gets too much. I want to be by your side,” I tell her, wrapping my arm around her back and pulling her close.
“I want that too, and do you know why?” she asks, gazing up at me with big, wide eyes.
“Why?”
“Because I love you.” I’ve never heard sweeter words in my life than having this woman in my arms, staring into my eyes, and saying them directly to me for the first time.
“I love you too,” I reply, dipping my head down and kissing her soft lips. I link my fingers with hers and notice the change right away.
Pulling my lips from hers, I glance down and notice her left hand. Or more accurately, the fact that her hand is now ringless. “You took it off?” I ask, my heart pounding against my breastbone.
“Yeah,” she says softly. “It was time. When I was visiting with Josh’s mom, I realized that the only way to fully move forward was to let go of the past.”
“I’m so proud of you,” I tell her before taking her lips in another searing kiss.
Realization sets in all too quickly, and I slowly pull back. It’s as if we both know it at the same time. She gives me a sad smile before turning and facing Josh’s stone.
“Thank you, Josh, for loving me. I’ll never forget you,” she whispers, closing her eyes and tilting her head up to the sky. “I’ll always love you.”
Just then, a light breeze picks up again. Her hair gently blows against my face, and I see her smile. I feel her smile, all the way down to the bottom of my heart. My heart that beats just for her.
When she’s ready, we turn and walk toward the cars. Our hands are still linked as I walk her to the car parked behind mine. My hand immediately goes to her face, brushing the hair from her forehead and tracing the gentle curve of her jaw. “What do you think?”
“I think I’m ready to go.”
“Do you want to go to my place?” I ask, not wanting to assume we’ll be going anywhere together, but damn sure hoping.
“Actually, I was kinda hoping we’d go to my place. I have a few things to put away.” I can see her resolve reflecting in her eyes.
“Are you sure? We don’t have to do this tonight,” I offer.
“No, I’m sure. I’m ready,” she says with conviction, giving me a decisive nod.
“I’ll follow you,” I reply, pulling her into my chest and placing a kiss on her forehead.
“Actually, I’ll follow you,” she sasses as she opens the driver’s door.
“I’ll meet you there,” I tell her before turning and heading to my own vehicle.
Before I climb in, I glance back at her. She has one foot inside the car, but she’s facing Josh’s final resting place. I almost turn and go back to her when she says, “Goodbye, Josh.”
