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“What’s wrong with that?” I asked him pointedly.
“Nothing. Never mind,” he said.
“Don’t take Damian’s snide remarks to heart. He judged me for my rom-com addiction, too,” Connor tossed out, easing up the slight nerves that Damian gave me. Why did I care what he thought anyway? We hadn’t shared one interaction with each other that was pleasant. Clearly, we were far from a match.
“Why are you so grumpy toward me all the time?” I asked Damian, unable not to take his remarks to heart. I couldn’t help it.
“For the love of God, don’t start crying,” Damian said, rolling his eyes.
“Damian! Stop it,” Aaliyah scolded her friend. He looked at her and then muttered an apology and excused himself to the restroom.
I sat back against the booth’s backing in complete dismay. “I’m sorry, but what is it with your friend? He’s such a jerk!”
Connor frowned. “Yeah, he can have quite a chip on his shoulder at times.”
“A chip? Please. He has a whole party-sized bag of Lay’s potato chips sitting on his shoulders. He’s the outcome of Scrooge and Cruella de Vil having a love child.”
Aaliyah smiled. “I mean, he has their grimaces locked down. But, I swear, he’s truly a gentle soul. He’s like hardened hummus.”
I cocked an eyebrow. “Excuse me?”
“You know at a party when you leave hummus out too long? And the top layer hardens over? But if you puncture it, there’s nice soft hummus beneath it? That’s Damian. He’s hardened hummus that you just have to poke a bit to get to the gooey insides.”
“That’s the oddest comparison ever,” I told her.
“Yeah, sweetheart. It’s really odd,” Connor agreed.
“I’m sorry.” Aaliyah’s eyes watered over. “I was just thinking about the hummus I had a few days ago, that I left out, and then I woke up and couldn’t eat it because it went bad, but I still shoved my pita chip into the hardened surface of it and cried when I got to the gooey middle. And ever since then, I’ve been craving hummus.”
Connor’s eyes filled with emotions. “Don’t cry. You know I’ll cry if you cry.”
“I’m sorry, but it was so good!” Aaliyah said, wiping at her tears.
I couldn’t help but laugh at the pregnant woman’s emotions that hit her husband’s emotions just as deeply. I swore it was as if they were one heart that was placed between two souls.
“It blows my mind how in touch with your emotions you both are, and somehow Damian is your best friend.”
Connor looked in the direction of the bathroom and then back to me. He rolled up his sleeves, then clapped his hands together. “Okay, well, while he’s gone, we can give you a crash course on how to deal with Damian.”
“Oh, I like this idea! Like How To Damian 101!” Aaliyah exclaimed excitedly as if she wasn’t just having a mental breakdown over hummus. “Like number one: never back down when he growls or huffs or grimaces. He uses these forms of aggression to push people away. Stand tall and huff right back if you have to.”
“That’s a solid one. And two: don’t let him disrespect you. Make it known when he actually hurts your feelings. Sometimes he’s so blunt that he doesn’t even realize it. But if you notify him that you were hurt by his words or actions, you’ll see the flash of realization in his eyes. Then his following actions will showcase his apology. Sometimes, he’ll even say it, but he often apologizes through his actions. He’s very much a show-not-tell kind of guy.”
“Number three: he has past trauma that he won’t talk about, but he does fear abandonment. So, he keeps people at a distance,” Aaliyah whispered as she noticed Damian exit the bathroom.
“And number four!” Connor said, leaning in toward me. “Tell the fucker to fuck off sometimes. Ninety-nine percent of the time, he doesn’t deserve to be told that. But there is that one percent when he needs to be put in his place. He respects people who stand up for themselves and stand up to him.”
“Yeah, and don’t forget that he’s hummus,” Aaliyah said, tapping the side of her noggin. “Just break him down a bit, and you’ll get to the good stuff.”
8
Damian
After dinner,Stella and I stood outside, waiting for the valet to pull Connor’s rental car around the corner. Aaliyah and Connor both ran off to the restrooms, leaving the two of us standing beside one another.
And, of course, good ole Stella couldn’t stand in silence for too long before she struck up a conversation.
“Your friends are so nice.” Stella tilted her head toward me and narrowed her eyes. “So I’m trying to figure out why you’re such a jerk.”
