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The next morning, as they sat in church, Aria couldn’t help but see Gareth through new eyes. She’d never thought that the crush she’d been harboring on the man would be given the chance to grow into something more.Maybe. She still wasn’t convinced.
While Janessa spoke to some people in the row behind them, Aria watched Gareth as he shook hands with the man who had preached the previous week. He spoke to him for a minute before climbing the steps to join the other musicians on the stage.
After greeting each of them with a handshake and a smile, Gareth sat down at the drums behind the plexiglass shield. He held a pair of drumsticks in his hand, but he didn’t start to play immediately.
She waited for him to look out across the congregation like he had the previous week, but he didn’t. The man with the guitar standing next to him strummed his instrument, but he also continued to speak to Gareth. As the two men conversed, Aria recalled that this wasn’t Gareth’s normal worship group, so that might explain why he didn’t seem to be as relaxed as he’d been the previous Sunday.
Remembering how she’d felt when his gaze had found her and he’d smiled, Aria wanted that again. However, his attention stayed mainly on the worship team.
When he did look away from them, his gaze landed on someone near the front, and he smiled at them before focusing back on the worship leader. In that moment, Aria was convinced that Janessa and Charli were wrong. Gareth was nice to everyone. There was nothing special about how he looked at her.
She’d spent the previous night reminding herself not to get her hopes up. Apparently, she hadn’t gotten the message because she felt acutely disappointed at that realization.
Lowering her gaze to her lap, she clenched her hands together. Aria shored up the defenses around her heart and tried to refocus her thoughts. Gareth and his interest in her, or lack thereof, didn’t matter right then. It wasn’t why she’d come to church that morning.
Despite her best intentions, it took a real force of her will to keep her attention from constantly drifting in Gareth’s direction. The struggle was worst during the singing since he was on the stage. But thankfully, once the pastor got up to preach, she could focus better.
She listened as the man spoke about the blessing of brokenness. Through all the struggles that had broken her over the past year, Aria had never viewed any of them as a blessing. More often, she’d thought of those struggles as a punishment of some sort.
“The Bible says that God does not despise a broken and contrite heart,” the man said. “In fact, it says in Psalm 34:18 that the Lord is near to those who have a broken heart and saves such as have a contrite spirit.”
Since coming to Serenity, she’d seen in others an approach to church and faith that made her really think about her own relationship with God. As her health had failed, her mom had been almost fanatical about making sure that Aria had accepted Jesus into her heart. She’d told Aria to read the Bible and pray. But following her mom’s death, Aria had done neither of those things.
The near constant ache in her heart soaked up the pastor’s words. The idea that God wanted to be close to her, even though she was struggling so much, seemed foreign to her. But, oh, how she wanted God to be near to her, to heal those parts of her that still hadn’t fit back into place.
Regardless of how things might or might not work out with Gareth, Aria wanted to be the best version of herself as she built a life in Serenity Point. She wasn’t sure exactly how to make that happen, but the sermon that day gave her hope.
When the service was over, Aria turned to Janessa. “I think I’m going to head home.”
“Uh…” Janessa’s brow furrowed, then she said, “Okay. We’ll see you there in a few.”
She’d brought her own car to church that morning, telling Janessa it was because she didn’t want her to feel like she had to leave when Aria wanted to. And even though she’d enjoyed the service, Aria was ready to leave as soon as it was over.
The sun was shining brightly as she left the church, but the air held a chill, causing her to hurry across the lot to where she’d parked earlier. It took her a few minutes to exit the parking lot since many were leaving at the same time.
She made it home without getting lost, where she was greeted by the aroma of chicken that Charli had put into the oven before they’d left for church. Since Janessa and Charli would be having a big meal with their family later, they’d decided to use the chicken to make sandwiches for lunch.
Aria went to her room to change out of the clothes she’d worn to church into something a little more comfortable. She had no plan to go out again that day, so comfy clothes were where it was at.
Once she was dressed in warm leggings, a sweatshirt, and thick socks, she headed back down to the kitchen. While she waited for Charli and Janessa, Aria set the table in the breakfast nook.
She was actually looking forward to a quiet evening. She had never needed time alone when living with her mom, but after acquiring her druggie roommates, she’d been desperate to be by herself. She’d been forced to spend time in her small room since she had nowhere else to go in the apartment. Now she didn’t mind spending time in her room because it was a beautiful, safe place, and she was choosing to be there instead of being forced there.
And it was the perfect place to get a little space to clearly think about how to deal with this Gareth situation. If Charli and Janessa hadn’t said anything, she could have just continued on with her little crush that no one else knew about.
But then Charli and Janessa had shared their thoughts, which complicated everything, and Gareth was ignorant of all of it. Which was definitely for the best. Unfortunately, it didn’t help the feeling that her little crush had grown by leaps and bounds over the past day, just because of the little bit of hope the two women had offered her.
Frankly, her feelings were a mess, so she needed some time and space to figure out how to deal with it all, especially since she’d be seeing him at work the next day.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Golden light spilled warm and inviting from the windows of his parents’ home as Gareth pulled his car to a stop. He was looking forward to spending time together with the family in anticipation of his parents’ departure the next day. They would only be gone a short time because they planned to be back for Cole’s state championship game—provided his team made it.
Cole would be going to stay with Jay, while Skylar and Bella would end up with Janessa and Charli. The teens protested that they should be allowed to stay by themselves at the house, but that hadn’t happened yet. And he wasn’t sure it ever would.
Gareth jogged up the steps and opened the front door of the house. He stepped into an aromatic warmth that embraced him and filled him with a sense of home. He quickly closed the door to keep the cold from sweeping into the house, then hung up his jacket.
“Hello, son,” his dad said when Gareth walked into the kitchen. He wore an apron and was washing up some dishes in the sink.
