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My heartbeat quicken, sure that I’m about to run myself right into the wall. There are also two large and rusty dumpsters sitting cockeyed to the wall. I really don’t want to run into anything in this alley. It all looks like a walking ad for tetanus. I’m so sure I’m going to run into something that it takes a moment to work up the courage to move.
I take a deep breath and slide my foot to the side, moving slow, certain I’ll hit resistance, but I don’t. My foot moves until my leg is as extended as I can do. I slide my right foot over to meet it, still keeping my eyes closed.
The sensation on my skin becomes complex. A cold tingling, and a sense of pressure almost like I’m pressing against something porous and hard. I want to open my eyes but as soon as the thought happens panic ensues. Reflexively my eyes crack partway and the inkling of what I think I see causes me to squeeze them tighter.
Move. Move. Move.
I repeat it like a mantra and force my left foot to slide out again, then join it with my right. As I straighten up again, the sensation of pressure eases. The soft tingling is still present but now there is also warmth.
Something rubs against my legs. I jump with a yelp and my eyes fly open. I stare at the Druid’s cat, which is weaving between my legs and purring loudly. Below the cat is thick, green grass.
“Congratulations, you did something,” the Druid says, his tone mocking.
I jerk up and he’s standing a few feet away. I can only imagine the shock on my face because he laughs so hard his shoulders jump up and down and tears form in his eyes.
“What did I do?”
“You decided.”
I stare at him in disbelief with no understanding of what he means. Which of course isn’t anything new. I take a deep breath and hold it for a second, then exhale it fast.
It’s the right question.I remind myself.
“I need to train.”
“Good for you,” he says, turning and moving away. The cat makes a mewling sound that is awfully close to a crying baby.
“Wait.” The Druid stops but doesn’t look back. “I need you to train me. You. No one else.”
“Is this a decision?”
I hesitate. Uncertainty batters through my thoughts like the wings of a thousand birds fluttering in panic. Before all of this I would never have considered myself indecisive and I’m not going to be now. I’m going to do what I think is right.
“Yes.”
He turns around, back hunched; the wrinkles on his face look deeper. His eyes are buried in them, twin burning coals at the end of a long dark tunnel. Despite that, they are piercing. They stab in and strip away any façade I present to the world.
“What changed?”
I can’t hide my surprise at his question. I shake my head and a dozen lies spring forward but each of them wilts on the vine. If I want him to be honest with me then the least I can do is give honesty in return.
“I realize I need to find the right question.”
He smiles, baring his nicotine-stained teeth dotted with bits of food and black cavities.
“Well enough, Destroyer. Let’s begin.”
ChapterTwenty-Four
A tingle racesover my skin like the lightest of touches. I force myself to keep my eyes closed and focus on my breathing. In and out in slow, regular breaths. Inhale, hold, then exhale slowly before a similarly slow inhale.
Let it flow.
“Good,” the Druid says.
In my head I imagine a sun, warming me inside. The tingling is a solar wind blowing across my body. In my core, deep inside, is an empty well which the power flows towards and fills. All I have to do is let it. I’m pooling the energy.
Suddenly the imaginary sun flares brighter and the light touch grows warm. Too warm, it’s burning. I grit my teeth, trying to retain control, but in seconds it’s too hot. My eyes fly open and I yelp, leaping out of my lotus position.
