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His brows furrow and for whatever reason, this second question, despite its insignificance, has him even more on edge with suspicion. “Don’t have one,” he murmurs slowly.
I roll my eyes and scoff. “Even Renz has a favorite color.” He arches a brow in question. I shrug. “What? We talked. Surprisingly, your high lord was rather forthcoming while you and Eli snoozed.”
Isaac narrows his eyes, confusion now fighting for dominance on his generally unexpressive face.Wow,I internally pat myself on the back. I’ve been able to pull two emotions from him in less than a minute. Seems like some sort of record.
Then, another emotion washes over him.
Understanding.
He nods, a slight tilt to his lips. “White.” This time, his voice holds undertones of amusement which makes his one-word statement instantly register in my brain as the joke that it is.
“I could tell!” I choke out around a surprisingly earnest ball of laughter. “Who would have thought,Isaac Russo, had jokes.” Zac just smirks and lifts a shoulder in response.
When I finally stop giggling, we fall back into silence. This time, it’s less awkward but my skin still feels tight with the urge to continue to get to know him. I open my mouth to ask some other random question, but Zac interrupts me.
“What are you doing, Violet?” The tone of his voice draws my eyes up to his face.
Fourth emotion, I mentally tally. Sincerity.
“Umm, trying to get to know you.” I give him aduhlook because it’s not like I was being discrete.
The silence falls over us once more, except this time, it’s stifling. Finally, I blurt, for the umpteenth time, “Are you in the Mafia?” And because this question has yet to have any success, I add, “Specifically the Costa Nostra.”
Zac doesn’t look shocked like Eli had nor does he look angry like Renz. He simply stares at me, before murmuring, “Cosa.” My nose squishes, not understanding the word. “Cosa Nostra. NotCosta. It’s Italian.”
I nod eagerly, happy to have some sort of acknowledgment, even if it’s not what I was looking for. I want to ask more questions. I want to know everything but I’m too afraid to spook him or make him push me away.
Isaac cocks his head to the side and considers me for a long moment. It feels as if he’s trying to read my thoughts. “Why do you keep asking us that question when you clearly already know the answer?” I suck my lip between my teeth and bite down in an effort to keep all of the words on the tip of my tongue from escaping. Zac’s eyes track the movement before he continues, “I think it’s because you’re looking for a confirmation, if for no other reason than to give yourself an excuse to run.”
“I’m not the one who runs,” I snap before I can stop myself. His eyes flare with heat and I imagine he’s picturing the ways he’d like to punish me for my outburst. Really, I’m beginning to think that Isaac is looking for any just cause to spank me at this point. My skin breaks out in goosebumps at the thought.
Zac sighs and looks away and for a moment, I think he’s shutting me out again, but then he says softly, “Did you ever think that maybe we left for a reason? You clearly know what and who we are and after what happened last night, you must be aware that our world is not a good one. Perhaps we were trying to keep you safe.”
Ihadconsidered that. I’ve considered it multiple times since Nova brought the whole thing up. I considered it even more after Eli walked back into my life, but the more time I’ve spent with the men, the more I feel like that’s a cop-out.
“PerhapsIam not the one you were trying to keep safe,” I whisper, afraid that if I say such a bold accusation any louder, Isaac will toss me out of this car and never speak to me again. He flinches but shows no other sign of hearing me. I continue, deciding to just lay it all out there while he’s semi-forced to hear me out. “Perhaps the three of you felt something that night. Something along the lines of, I don’t know, liking me? Maybe you felt—” I pause as nervous butterflies climb up my throat.
Zac turns to look at me, his features softer than I’ve ever seen them before. “Felt what, Princess?” he asks, and this time, his voice isn’t masked. He isn’t hiding anything that I have to pull apart and attempt to identify. This time, Isaac’s voice is imploring. Like he needs to know what I was about to say more than he needs his next breath.
Swallowing, I look down and focus on my hands in my lap as I tug on the sleeves of his oversized sweatshirt. “Maybe you felt what I felt. A connection. Like you wanted more.” My words are barely above a whisper, and I can’t bring myself to look up at him, to see the rejection in his eyes.
When he says nothing, does nothing, the tension, anxiety, and regret inside of me begin to thrash around almost painfully. I’m just about to demand the driver pulls the car over so I can hightail it out of here when I feel a single, soft finger beneath my chin.
“Look at me, Violet.” Isaac’s words are quiet but hold a note of demand that I cannot physically ignore, no matter how badly I want to.I crave his demands. When I finally drag my gaze up to meet his, my body shudders at what I see.
Eli had looked at me in a way that made me feel adored. Like I am something precious that he wants to hold onto but is unsure how to grasp.
Renz looked at me with a gaze so hot, that I instantly felt consumed. Destroyed and recreated, all at once.
But Isaac….
Isaac is looking at me as though hesees me. Really, truly sees me. And for the first time in my entire life, I want to be seen.
All of me.
Every single vulnerable, broken, needy piece of me. Every part of me that aches to be loved and cherished. Every hidden crack and exposed nerve.
So, I let him. I silently, give him permission to look, daring him to explore while begging him not to break me.
