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My heart was racing, my stomach all chewed up. My legs were wobbly and my throat was dry, and life felt unsteady and raw.
And all I wanted was him.
The man who laid everything on the line, who walked the road of truth and honour, no matter where that took him.
“Please,” I said. “Kiss me, Carl, right here.”
He turned his head and his lips were so close to mine. “We come together or not at all,” he whispered. “That’s how we are.”
I stroked his face. “But we’re a three now, right?”
“Yes. That’s right.”
“So, things have got to change, no? Move forward? Evolve?”
“What do you mean?”
His breath was hot on my lips, and I breathed him in. “I love you, Carl.”
He stopped breathing, and his eyes turned wide.
“I love you, and I love Rick. I love both of you. I love bothof you together, and both of you as just yourself. Sometimes I’ll want to love Rick, and sometimes I’ll want to love you, and sometimes, most of the time, I’ll want to love you both together.” I let him digest my words. “And sometimes I’ll want you to love each other without me. That’s how three should work, Carl. That’s how I want it to work. Naturally, however it feels right.”
“Katie… I don’t know…”
I put a finger to his lips. “Do you love me, Carl? I know you don’t like to say it, but I’m asking you. And I’ll know you’ll give me the truth because…”
He moved my hand from his mouth, and his lips pressed to mine. He took a breath, took my face in his hands, and he kissed me. He kissed me like he loved me.
And then he said it.
“Yes, I love you, Katie.” He paused. “And so does Rick, and he’s waiting for us at home.”
I pictured Rick, his kind smile, his beautiful body. The way he loved so easily.
I nodded. “Ok,” I said. “Let’s go home.”
His fingers were in my hair before I could move, holding me tight, holding me still. His mouth was urgent this time, his tongue hunting mine, his breath ragged. He let out a low moan, and pulled my body close to his, the warmth of him burning me up.
And then he let me go.
“We’ll talk about this,” he said. “All of us. We’ll make this work as a three, together and separately. It’s time.”
He pulled away from the truck stop.
“It’s real,” I said. “I told my mum about us.”
He raised his eyebrows as he worked up through the gears. “You really did cover a lot of ground this evening. What did she say?”
I laughed a little, remembering the moment. The shock, the surprise, the awkward questions.Do you… with both of them? At the same time? And do they…? Are they…? How does this work, Katie? How does it ever work?
And what about the future, Katie? What about marriage? What about kids?
And then my shock, my shock at the realisation I wasn’t repulsed, wasn’t armed with my usualI don’t even want kidsannouncement, that I’d been using right through my teens, right off the cuff.
I cut a long story short.
“She said she wants to meet you. Properly.” I smiled. “She wants to meet you both.”
