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“Yes. Thank you very much, Lash. I’m sorry to be a pain in the ass, but I just can’t. I’m sorry Talon.”
With a nod from Lash, Austin makes his way to us and grabs our bags from Talon’s hands. He leads us through the common room, down a hallway, and out the back door where I see what looks to be two row houses. I’m not sure how many, but it looks to be multiple apartments all connected in one building with a second one behind it. It’s enough to give privacy to those staying in them while still being at the clubhouse. Austin walks up to the first one and unlocks the door for us. After letting us go in before him, he walks in far enough to set our bags down and let us know he’ll be right next door. He just has to run inside to grab some clothes and things before coming back out.
Walking around the apartment, there are two bedrooms, a bathroom at the end of the hallway where the bathrooms are, a small kitchen, and a living room. We have a TV to watch as my mom sits down on one of the couches and turns it on to see what channels we have. Apparently it’s a smart TV and has most of the streaming services available with accounts already set up for us to use. She’s in heaven as she searches for some program she started watching at home. I know what she’ll be doing for the foreseeable future.
Giving my mom a kiss on her cheek, I tell her I’m heading to bed. Unlike her, I don’t need to unwind. Not when I haven’t been able to sleep all that good in the last few weeks. I’m either constantly waking up from nightmares and other dreams filling my mind, or I lay in bed and stare at the ceiling for hours and hours not being able to sleep. I’ve tried everything I can think of to help me sleep; hot cup of tea, warm glass of milk, counting sheep, pretending I’m asleep until I actually fall asleep, and anything else I can think of.
Walking in the smaller of the two bedrooms, I slide my shoes off and collapse in bed without pulling the blankets back, changing into pajamas, or anything else. My eyes close and sleep claims me. At this point, I’m so damn tired there’s nothing that could keep me awake.
We’ve been in the apartment behind the clubhouse for almost a week now. My mom has no problem going inside the clubhouse for meals when she doesn’t feel like cooking. Or just to hang out with the ol’ ladies when they’re there. They’ve been teaching her the ways of the world they live in and she’s happy to have someone to talk to. I remain locked in the apartment, so I don’t have to see anyone. Jaelyn walks out to see me and hangs out for a while before going to her sister’s house or back in the clubhouse to hang out with everyone. Unless it’s a party night. Then she’s at her sister’s watching her nephew until Hartley and Lash make their way back home.
I still don’t have much of an appetite which I try to hide from my mom. She brings me food from the clubhouse if she hasn’t cooked anything here at the house. When I do accept the plates she hands over to me, I usually just push the food around on my plate after taking a bite or two. I have been getting sick the last few mornings and I know it’s the stress of everything getting the better of me.
Today I’m cleaning the apartment, so I have something to do despite not having any energy and wanting to crawl back in bed with the covers over my head. There’s a knock on the door. Without thinking, I open it to find Talon standing on the small porch. His hands are resting against the door frame, and he looks worse than he did in Farnsworth. I have no clue what’s going on with him and my heart goes out to him.
“What are you doing here, Talon?” I ask him, stepping back for him to enter as I get dizzy as hell for a few seconds.
“I’m here to see you. I’ve given you time to get over bein’ pissed at me for bringin’ you back here. Still, you haven’t come in the clubhouse for any reason while your mom makes a point to stop in and hang out for a little while every single day. She’s worried about you, and I’m worried about you. The only person besides your mom you speak to is Jaelyn. What have I done to piss you off to the point you refuse to have anythin’ to do with me now?”
“It’s not you, Talon. I know you want to give this a try, and I’m not saying we can’t or won’t. It’s just everything in my world has been changing at such a rapid pace the last few weeks and I can’t seem to catch my breath or wrap my mind around anything. I just need some time,” I tell him truthfully as spots form in my eyes and everything starts to fade away.
I feel as if I’m having an out of body experience with the way my limbs become heavy, my vision blurs, and I start to fall to the floor beneath me. Vaguely as the blackness overtakes me, I feel Talon’s strong arms wrapping around me as his voice calling out my name fades into oblivion.
I have no clue how much time has passed when I wake up. There’s a pinch in my arm as I remain lying as still as possible. My head hurts, I’m nauseas, and there’s a loud beeping noise making my head hurt even more. Slowly and carefully, I open my eyes to find Talon resting his head on the side of the bed I’m in with his hand wrapped up in mine. His large hand engulfs my smaller one and covers me in a warmth I haven’t felt since the night he took me out around my hometown. It’s what I’ve been missing, and I didn’t even realize it. I’ve been trying to push him away before he could push me away and break my heart into a million pieces.
My fingers twitch causing Talon’s head to snap up. He looks at me, exhaustion filling his eyes and face. He gives me a small smile that can barely be classified as one before I open my mouth.
“What happened?” I ask him, not sure why I’m now in the hospital.
“You collapsed in the apartment. I knew you were barley eatin’, Bronwan. Fuck! I’ve never been so scared in my life,” he says, his voice pained and filled with emotion.
“Why did I collapse though?”
“You’re severely dehydrated, you haven’t been eatin’, and they’re thinkin’ you’re exhausted as well. They’ve taken some blood to run some tests and dependin’ on what the results are from that, determines what happens next,” he informs me, placing a soft kiss against the back of my hand. “They’re runnin’ fluids through an IV for now to help hydrate you and I’m sure they’re goin’ to have a tray of food sent down here for you too. Get some sleep before the doctors come in again to poke and prod you some more.”
“Where’s my mom?”
“She just stepped out to get some coffee. Everyone is out in the waitin’ room to see what’s goin’ on with you.”
“They don’t need to be here. I’m sure I’ll be fine. You can go too, Talon. I’m sure you have things to do and don’t need to be wasting your time here in the hospital with me.”
“Not happenin’, Red. I told you I want to see where this goes, and I mean it. If you’re sick or hurt, I’m not gonna leave your side. Get used to it,” he says in his domineering way. “Jaelyn and Hartley are really worried about you too. They’ve taken you under their wings and I’m sure you’re goin’ to hear an earful from them when they see you.”
“I think I’m gonna close my eyes for a little bit.”
“Sleep, Red. I’m not goin’ anywhere.”
With another kiss on my hand, I let my eyes slide closed, and sleep claim me. I’m so tired and apparently my body has had enough. Now, I can’t think of doing anything other than sleeping and catching up on all the sleep I missed over the last few weeks with nightmares and not being able to fall asleep until hours go by only to wake up in an hour or two. The last thing I wanted to happen was to end up in the hospital. There’s really nothing I can do about it now though I guess.
MY PLAN FOR the day was to spend some time with Bronwan in the apartment while her mom was hanging out in the clubhouse with Jaelyn, Hartley, Iris, and Trina. I didn’t care what we did as long as we were together. All I want is to see her and start really getting to know her. It’s hard to make that happen in a clubhouse full of people. So, I’m kind of glad she stood her ground about not staying in my room with me. I wasn’t even thinking about putting them in the apartments. It’s too far away for my comfort.
Yes, I’ll fully admit I was a little angry she didn’t want to sleep in my bed with me again. I want to fall asleep with her body wrapped around mine and wake up to her hair covering my face with my arms wrapped around her. Instead, she said she wasn’t going to stay in my room with me. It’s a blow to a man’s ego knowing the woman he wants doesn’t want to sleep with him. And I just mean sleep. Not having sex or anything. Unless she wanted to.
When I showed up at the apartment and Bronwan started to go down, I snapped. I barely caught her before she hit the floor and her head on the edge of the stand sitting behind her. I’ve never seen anything like it before. Then, I couldn’t wake her up. No matter what I did, she wouldn’t open her eyes or talk to me. Hell, I had to check her chest just to make sure she was still breathing. Not good at all. Instead of calling for an ambulance to come get her, I called Death. He brought my truck over to the apartment and I carried her out to the backseat. The entire trip there with my brother driving, I kept her in my arms, running my fingers through her hair and talking quietly to her.
They took her right back to an exam room, hooked her up to an IV, talked to me about what happened and what’s been going on with her recently, and then took some blood. The doctors told me exactly what I informed Bronwan of. She’s severely dehydrated, hasn’t been eating, and I know she’s not been sleeping very good. Even her mom knows that. Before Bronwan left the clubhouse, she was waking up more than once a night with nightmares. I can’t imagine how it’s been since losing her father and then hearing the same men who took her were in her hometown and she was uprooted once again. It’s definitely fucking with her, and I wasn’t there by her side to chase the demons away.
Now, I’m watching as she sleeps and gets the rest she truly needs and has been deprived of. I managed to fall asleep for a few minutes before she woke up because I haven’t been sleeping either. Knowing she’s so close by and there’s no way I can go to the apartment and sleep in bed with her. Honestly, I haven’t been able to get more than a few hours of sleep since I left the clubhouse without her. I’m used to having her in my bed. Now, she’s not in my bed despite being at the compound. It sucks more than I thought it would.
