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“I wish! That seems a whole lot better than spending your entire life alone.”
“The silence must have been nice.”
I laugh. “It got old fast. If everything goes my way, I plan on having enough kids to fill a whole house so they never have to grow up feeling the way I did.”
He shoves the gear stick a bit harder than necessary. “Kids?”
“A whole minivan if I’m lucky.”
“I didn’t know you wanted a big family.” A vein in his neck throbs.
“You never asked, and I didn’t think it mattered.”
“Why not?”
“Because we only agreed to one child.”
“What if that weren’t the case?”
I feel shocked by his question. “What exactly are you suggesting?”
He pauses, clearly thinking of a response before shaking his head. “Nothing.”
Nothing?I want answers, but my fear of his response stops me from asking any questions. And with the way he shuts down, I know that I’m not going to get them today anyway.
Maybe it’s for the best.
1 Noun, Norwegian: That overwhelming gut-rush euphoriaexclusive to the beginnings of falling in love.
31
IRIS
There is no way Declan’s target happened to go to the Chicago Botanic Garden on a Saturday. After our whole conversation in the car, I know he planned this for me. Not that he would ever admit it. So rather than call him out on it, I go along with the whole charade. I’m far too excited about visiting the garden to ruin it by calling Declan out on his lie.
The garden is my favorite place in the entire world—sorry, Dreamland. I have so many fond memories here, dating all the way back to my childhood. My mom, Nana, and I would come here together after my Saturday tutoring sessions. Mom and I would visit all the gardens while Nana would huff and puff about her busted knee, only to be easily swayed by the pretty flowers and champagne popsicles.
I laugh as Declan grabs a map from an information stand. He doesn’t ask for my help, and I don’t bother offering it. While I know every corner of this place, watching him assess the map like we are exploring uncharted territory is far too entertaining to pass up.
He locates our current position on the map. “Is there a certain strategy to all this?”
“Strategy? It’s a garden, not a chessboard.” I laugh.
“Fair point. Then is there something in particular you want to see first?”
“Shouldn’t we go wherever the person you came to see is?” I push my lips together to prevent giving myself away.
“I don’t know where they are.” He says the lie with such ease, it unsettles me enough to push for more.
“You know, if I knew what they looked like, it would make this process a little easier. How else am I supposed to know when we need to pretend?”
Declan shuts the map, pockets it, and grabs my hand. “We don’t.”
Sparks shoot up my arm from the contact. “So, what? We just act like a couple the entire time?”
“Exactly.”
I fake groan. “But this place is huge. It could take hours before we find them.”
