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Twenty-Five
Jamie
Sometimes life surprises you, and what you expect or fear is going to happen, doesn’t. But then the fact it didn’t happen scares you even more. That’s how I felt this morning when an incessant buzzing woke me, and there I was still wrapped in Seb’s arms as he snored away behind me.
After a little jab in Seb’s ribs to wake him when I realised the buzzing was his phone, he kissed my neck while I feigned sleep, but as he rolled over to pick his phone up from the bedside table, he told me I’d pay for that jab as soon as he was done with his call. His voice was husky from sleep, drawing goosebumps to the surface of my skin and had me rubbing my thighs together with the delicious pleasure his threat promised.
He didn’t disappoint, and now I’m sitting at Rick’s breakfast bar sipping a cup of tea with a delectable soreness all through my body.
I watch the clouds through the kitchen window, and as one begins to dissipate, a face appears. I scrunch my eyes trying to see it better, and a small gasp leaves me as its features are revealed. It looks like Alex, and a tear rolls down my cheek as the cloud twists and moves away.
I know it’s not really Alex, and just my emotions transposing themselves onto random objects. Something known as pareidolia. The most well-known example is Rorschach’s inkblot test, which supposedly reveals people’s hidden feelings. You don’t need to be a genius or psychologist to work out what mine are.
I feel like a sand timer as my emotions trickle through before free falling and exploding into a vast emptiness, and just as I think I have them under control, they’re flipped on their head.
The sound of the front door closing has me spinning on my stool, and seconds later, Jay strolls into the kitchen looking dog tired.
“Hey,” I say to him as he sees me sitting here. I’m shocked as he comes over and kisses me on the head before grabbing a cup and making coffee.
“Did you sleep?” he asks as he stirs sugar into his cup.
“I did actually. Did you? ‘Cause I got to say, you look like shit.”
Jay chuckles as he takes a seat across from me. “Straight shooter. I like that about you,” he says with a wink. “No. I didn’t sleep yet. Where is everyone?” He offers no explanation for the fact he’s not slept, but I’m guessing it has something to do with him chasing down information about last night.
I don’t get a chance to ask what he found out or answer his question about where everyone is as Seb and Rick walk in, talking in hushed voices. Both walk over to me, Rick kissing me on the head as Jay did, which is no surprise, but Seb takes my face in his hands and kisses me. The scent of his shower gel wraps around me, and I can taste the spearmint of his toothpaste as his tongue swipes across my lips, asking for entry. My head becomes fuzzy as he deepens the kiss, my tongue tangling with his, and I forget where we are.
A cough and a snigger snap me out this lusty haze, and I try to break the kiss, but Seb holds on a second or two longer, biting my lip as he pulls back. Okay, I can honestly say that I need new knickers. Hell, I think I need new trousers and a dip in an ice pool to cool down after that.
“I would say get a room, but I’m not sure I can listen to another round of you two going at it,” Rick says, a lick of humour tracing his words.
“You’re just jealous, old man,” Seb says, pouring himself a coffee before taking the seat next to me. “Tell me, how long is it since you wet your dick?” I slap Seb’s arm, almost making him spill coffee over his crisp white t-shit. “What? Don’t pretend you’re some sweet and innocent virgin over here, Jamie. You know, Blue told me about that day in your kitchen when you were telling Cam about rubbing one out. Or should I say paddling the pink canoe, huh.” He raises a brow, and his eyes sparkle with mischief.
Jay cracks up, and I even hear a laugh from Rick. The guys banter back and forth for the next five minutes, both Seb and Jay ribbing Rick about getting laid, and it lifts the heavy mood. But the laughter dies as my father enters the room.
Not one to be intimidated by the hostile tension in the air, my dad strolls forward, offering a ‘morning’ to everyone. The guys grumble a greeting in return, but I can’t bring myself to answer as all the sadness and anger the laughter washed away temporarily returns.
Rick makes my dad a tea, and once we are all settled at the counter, Jay begins filling us in about what he discovered last night after leaving here.
It turns out Jasper attempted to arrest the man who killed Alex, but he pistol-whipped Jasper and got away. When the police arrived, Jasper was conscious, but not coherent enough for them to get anything substantial from him.
“I have to go to the police and tell them what happened.”
“No.” One word spat from my dad like law.
“No? What the hell do you mean no?” I grit my teeth, clenching my hands into fists and about to get to my feet. If only I had a gun, I’d pistol-whip my father right now. Seb takes my hand, unfurling my fingers, laying it flat on my thigh and resting his over the top with his fingers intertwined with mine.
“I don’t want the police involved, Jamie. That’s why I came to Rick in the first place.”
I take a deep breath, trying to let the feel of Seb’s hand on mine keep me from launching myself at my dad. “If you think I’m going to sit here quietly while the bastard that killed my friend walks free, then you don’t know me at all. I wouldn’t be the daughter you raised if I did that.”
Rick, Seb and Jay watch me carefully, and I can tell they aren’t sure how this is going to end or if they’ll need to prevent more bloodshed.
A small smile flashes across my dad’s face at those words, knowing that they are true.
“I understand that, Jamie, and I admire it. I really do, but you know sometimes things aren’t as straight forward as you think. I need to worry about you and your mum, not some guy you’ve not seen since school.”
I suck in a shocked breath at his words. I don’t hear any more of what he says as a picture of Alex’s smile flashes in my mind, and then it vanishes and is replaced by the image of him lying on the cold concrete outside Rosco’s. I feel the loss of him deep in my bones, and a white-hot rage burns through me at the way my dad just dismissed his death. My hand curls on my thigh, squeezing Seb’s fingers as my nails dig into my leg.
