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Jumping to my feet, I cut off whatever my dad was saying.
“How fucking dare you dismiss Alex so easily. The one guy that kept me together after I was betrayed by the two most important people in my life after you and mum, and who held me every night for a solid month to keep the nightmares away after Josh’s death.” I’m shouting, and I don’t care one fucking bit. I don’t even register what I’m saying until it’s out there. I begin to shake with so much anger coursing through me, and when I look at my dad, I see the shock on his face. He never knew the full extent of what happened after Josh and Amber’s deaths. He wasn’t there for me. I feel a hand on my back, and I flinch at the touch, turning to see Seb. As the realisation of what I just blurted out sinks in, I watch my dad’s Adam’s apple bob up and down in his throat, and a flicker of pain crosses his face.
“Jamie, I’m sorry. I didn’t…” He stops, rubbing a hand over his mouth. “I had no idea he was so important to you. But you have to understand—”
“Save it, Dad. You know what, it’s fine for you to be worried about me and mum, but not at the expense of my friend’s murderer going free. Have you even considered what would have happened if Alex or Jay hadn’t been there?” I say, pointing to Jay, who looks more than a little uncomfortable to be singled out. “And what’s to say that next time it won’t be me or mum lying on a slab at the morgue, huh?” My dad baulks at that, but I carry on regardless. “You don’t want to go to the police about some madman threatening your family, fine. I’ll go to them, and I won’t mention a damn word about you or what I know.”
Surprisingly, it’s Rick that intervenes. Ever the peacemaker. Me? I’m beginning to wonder what it is my dad’s not saying. All the times in the past my dad’s had threats against him, he’s always gone to the police. I don’t understand what’s so different about this time.
As Rick tries to calm the situation down, Seb pulls me to rest in between his legs, and I’m conscious he’s going to want answers about Alex, and Josh and Amber. I wish I could gag myself sometimes.
I can feel my dad’s eyes on us, or more specifically, Seb. I guess he doesn’t like Seb much, and the fact Seb is holding me, while whispering in my ear, must be really pissing him off. Good. I heard Dad asking Seb about me last night, so I make a note to ask Seb about my dad’s clear dislike of him later.
We chat back and forth for a while longer, but things become a little strained when I announce that I want to go see Jasper. I’m met by four very loud, resounding nos. To which I counter argue that I can find out more of what Jasper knows and give my side of things at the same time. They finally agree on the proviso someone comes with me, to which I agree. Seb seems like the obvious choice, but I throw that idea out the window and declare I want Jay with me.
Seb tenses beneath me, and I twist in his arms, well aware that every eye in the room is on us. I lean in and whisper, “Don’t be mad. Having you there will make things difficult, and I need Jasper to talk to me, not spend the whole time watching you two shoot daggers at each other and wondering who has the biggest dick.”
A look of disgust passes over Seb’s face causing a crease in his brow before it smooths out, and his eyes light as he says, “We both know the answer to that question. I’m not happy about any of this, just so you know, but I understand why you need to do this.” He places a kiss on the pulse point behind my ear that sends a shiver down my spine before turning to speak to the whole room. “Jay, you’ll go with Jamie to see Jasper. But not before you’ve had some sleep, man. You look ready to drop.”
