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“Wantis a strong word,” I said, evenly. “But it seems like the best option.”
“There has to be a less humiliating option… ”
“It’s the option that’s least likely to get you killed.” I narrowed my eyes at her, trying to figure out why she was being so uncharacteristically difficult.
“Fine. Great. Just put me in your pocket, then, like a bit of spare change.”
“Lina—” I started, but she cut me off.
“No, it’s fine.” She grimaced and reached for my pocket, then refused to say another word.
9
Lina
Pain lanced through my back, and I was secretly grateful—in spite of my initial argument—that I had the privacy of Edrich’s shirt pocket to hide in. It was excruciating. A kind of searing agony burning up and down my spine and shoulder blades.
The thick, soft fabric of his shirt concealed the pulsating colors ebbing off of me. Every inch of me hurt, and my ointment, or what was left of it, was in Maggie’s saddle bag.
I took slow, measured breaths and tried to wait out the aching. This spasm seemed to last longer than the others. I only had a few days’ supply left, if that. I told myself that was why I didn’t ask Edrich to hand it to me.Or why I wouldn't mention I was even in pain, at all.
Perhaps I’d need it more later on…
I couldn’t wrap my head around why I was having so many flare-ups lately.
Is it because I can’t reach my entire back? Am I not using it enough?
I distracted myself by inhaling the heady smell of campfire and meadows that radiated off of him. Then there was the freshly baked chocolate cookie from Vale nestled next to me. The combination smelled like home, and it was easy to imagine myself somewhere else for a moment.
I eyed the cookie again.At least I can seek solace for my stomach, if not for anything else.
When the pain finally subsided, I slowly stood to peer out of Edrich’s pocket. He hadn’t said anything in ages. Not since he saw that I was lying to him.
I hated the distance that had grown between us over the years. I’d tried to pretend I hadn’t noticed. I’d tried to make everything normal.
But I’d felt it, deep in my bones. Maybe bringing him with me was a last-ditch effort at maintaining a friendship that had dissolved long ago… ending it on a better note than it had been over the past several years.
I felt, more than saw, myself turning a pale shade of blue.
No.
I couldn’t believe that. Friendships made in youth are cemented for life… right?
I shook off the different sort of ache that thought filled me with, and stood at my full height, resting my arms on the rim of Edrich’s pocket. I only looked up at him when I was certain I was my normal coloring again.
He was focused on the path before us. From this vantage point, the forest looked a little less daunting.
The trees still towered over us, the trunks wider than any back on the farm. And the bark was so dark, it was almost black. Leaves of every shade of green and blue and yellow and red hung heavy on the branches as Edrich ducked between their grasps. If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear it was almost as if they had fingers and were trying to hold onto us in an attempt to keep us here forever.
So maybe not that much less daunting, then.I gulped.
You are not afraid, Lina. This is probably, most definitely, your home… so there is no reason to be afraid. Probably…
I repeated the words silently to myself as twigs snapped under Edrich’s feet and eerie sounds came from deep in the woods ahead of us.
This is your true home. You belong here.
The more I assured myself of these things, the more I believed it.
