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They both burst out laughing.
“We celebrate the winter solstice, but it’s nothing like what humans do for their holidays. If we were at home, families would come together and eat a nice meal. No gifts or decorations or strange music about magical caribou or a fat man that breaks into homes.”
Again, that was a strange summary, but from their perspective, that’s what it looked like.
“So do we get a break around the winter solstice to go home?”
They both shook their heads. “No breaks until summer.”
How was I going to break that news to Aiden? Did my parents already know? Did Masie tell them? Why hadn’t she warned me?
It was another topic we never had a chance to cover. In the grand scheme, it was low on the list of priorities. I shouldn’t have been surprised it never came up.
“Niall texted. They’re coming back,” Kaden announced on his way to the fridge. “Have you had anything to eat? Are you hungry?”
“No, thanks.” I couldn’t think of eating right now. Not while my stomach was in knots. Had Niall been able to calm down Sai? Did he understand that me kissing one of them didn’t mean anything against him? I wasn’t sure how to explain things, but hopefully, he would be patient.
Kaden had a sandwich and chips on a plate by the time the door opened, and Sai walked in, trailed by Niall. I watched both of them, hoping one would give me a hint as to where they stood, but neither said a word.
Niall eyed Kaden’s sandwich and went to the fridge to pull out the ingredients.
Sai went to his door like he was going to avoid us, but stopped. “Can we talk?”
He didn’t look at me, didn’t turn, but I knew he was talking to me.
Theo gave me an encouraging nod as I stood and passed him. I stepped into their bedroom for the first time and was pleasantly surprised by how clean it was. It also smelled like a mix of them. Clove and pine and the manufactured manly scent of their soap.
He shut the door, and I cast a silencing spell so we wouldn’t be overheard.
“Thanks.” He fell onto his bed, staring at his feet.
“I’m sorry you saw that, Sai. You told me you weren’t comfortable, and I should have been more aware and more respectful.”
He shook his head. “That wasn’t why I was mad.”
It wasn’t?
“It was just a quick peck. I wanted to thank him for getting me out of class so quickly.”
“It’s not that.” His head shot up, and he finally met my eyes.
“Then what?” I didn’t want to keep guessing.
“Why am I last?”
I racked my brain trying to think of what he meant. Had I ever said anything about him being last? “Last for what?”
He held my gaze for a moment. His cheeks reddened, and he turned away. “Getting close to you. Touching you. Kissing you? Why me?”
No. I fought for patience because I refused for this to become an issue. “Sai, we can’t do this.”
He ignored me. “What have I done wrong?”
His voice cracked, and some of my frustration dissipated. He was struggling, and I needed to be respectful of that and not blow it off. I would hate for any of them to dismiss my feelings like that. “Nothing.”
“Then why?” he begged. “I’m the one you talk to. I’m the one who comforts you. I’m the one you come to when you can’t talk to anyone else.”
He was. Up until the bonding, he was the one I felt safest around. I trusted him. I knew I could rely on him and confide in him, but things changed these past two weeks. I had to learn to allow all the guys to be there for me. I couldn’t only run to Sai like I used to, but I couldn’t say that. Not while he was hurting.
