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I turned the doorknob with a shaky hand and walked in the front door. The look on my face told my mother the news. She rushed down the hall and took me into her arms.“I’m so sorry, mom,” I cry. She hushed me and rubbed my back while saying, “this is not something someone can control. I’m sorry the gene runs in our family. But it’s not confirmed yet. This could be nothing.”
She takes hold of my arms and pulls back, looking into my face. “Whatever it is, you are not alone. We all love you and will be with you every step.” I hug her again, and we walk back into the kitchen. I excuse myself to use the bathroom while Mom updates Dad.
When I open the door to exit, he is there with open arms. “Daddy,” I gasp and see Keni standing to the side, waiting for her turn. After a moment, he released, and she wasted no time filling the gap between us. “Hey, hey.” I feel her tears through the cotton of my shirt.
“I got this, no worries. Okay?” I try to be brave for my little sister. I calm myself again with a few deep breaths, and we walk into the living room. Once we all settle, Nicki arrives, and I explain step by step what they did, “And mom, you were right, they squish them like a pancake.” I can’t help the chuckle that bubbles up from my throat and the relief I feel talking about this. I am so lucky to have a family who listens and is here for me whenever I need them, day or night.
Once everyone is over the initial shock, we agree it will stay between us. There is no reason to let any of the other family members know until we have the results.
“What about Jacob?” My father asks while leaning back in the recliner. “What about him?” I ask. “Don’t you think you should tell him?” I shrug my shoulders, “No. It’s none of his business.” I stand from the couch and take my purse from the end table.
“He loves you, you know?” he says. “Yeah, Dad, and I love him, but I don’t want to be with someone if it’s out of pity. Or worse, if I’m not going to be able to grow old with him. Just don’t say anything, please?” I plead with my eyes. He nods.
“I’m going home. I need to wash this day away and start fresh tomorrow.” Hugs and kisses are passed out to all along with a thank you, and I leave.
Home is exactly the place where I need to be.
