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“Besides quit PT and OT?”
I jerk back, glaring at him.What the hell? Is he seriously giving me shit about this?
“What does that mean?”
“It seems like you’re giving up.”
“I’m giving up?” My face heats, the anger I feel inside trying to make its way out. “I stopped because it was getting me absolutely nowhere.”
“So, that’s it? You’re done with baseball?”
“That was pretty much decided for me,” I say through gritted teeth.
“He said that you couldn’t pitch for him, not that you couldn’t play.”
My voice drops to a growl. “What am I supposed to do? Learn to play leftie? I can’t play like I used to. There’s no point. Therapy wasn’t helping. It’s time to let go of this part of my life. That means you need to let go of it, too.”
“Maybe I would if I thought you were letting go of it. But I don’t think you are. I think you’re holding on to it. Beating yourself up with it.”
“You don’t know shit,” I spit.
He holds up his hands. “Maybe I don’t. But does Rae?”
I step in toward him, ready to slug him.What the hell is up his ass tonight?“What the hell do you mean by that?”
“You went through a lot this year. And maybe you talked to me about some of the stuff that happened with Rae, but you didn’t talk about this. You keep going on pretending you’re fine, and you’re not. You aren’t talking to Miles or me, so I’m wondering if you’re talking to her.”
“There’s nothing to talk about!” I yell.
He nods with that knowing look on his face that makes me want to punch him.
“See, that’s where you’re wrong. Just because you tell yourself it’s nothing doesn’t mean it is. And if you don’t talk to someone, and especially if you don’t talk to Rae, it’s only going to fester and get worse. I don’t want that for you. I don’t want that for you and Rae.”
“How about you let me deal with my relationship, okay?”
I grab a case of beer and turn to walk away.
“You’re going to hurt her.”
I spin back to face him as those words hit me.
He sighs dramatically. “I’m not trying to be a dick. If you’re really fine, then good, that’s great. But if you’re not and you don’t let her in, you’re going to hurt her and your relationship. I know how much you love her, so keep that in mind, okay?”
That I’m going to hurt her?
Am I?
“Hey.” Joel sets the cases of soda he’s carrying down and puts a hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry. Tonight’s about celebrating, being together. I don’t want to piss you off.”
I roll my eyes slightly. That’s Joel. Always butting in where he shouldn’t and apologizing two seconds later.
“It’s fine. Now let’s get the drinks out there before Trev melts down, okay?”
He chuckles. “Yeah. Let’s go.”
When we get to the top of the stairs, Rae is aimlessly milling about the kitchen. Joel and I exchange a glance.She was listening.
“Hey, guys. What’s up?”
