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“Feels like it is.”
He scooches closer and looks into my eyes. “It isn’t.”
“Well, you have time to work on strengthening it again, right? Coaches won’t be looking until the start of the season, right?”
“Yeah, but it’ll help to have ones for the schools I’m interested in lined up. I don’t know. My head’s messed up about it all. Thinking about college stresses me out.”
“You have time, you know. And I’m here for you.”
“Yeah…” he says quietly.
“Ace…” I stick out my lip.
He rolls his eyes and pokes it. “Put that away.”
“What do you want?” I ask him.
He sits for a minute, thinking. Finally, he says softly, “You.”
My eyes go wide.
Um, excuse me, what now?
“Um, wh—what?”
He blinks a couple of times, realizing what he said.
“Oh, I, um… I meant I want us to go to college together.”
I inhale deeply, trying to calm my heart, which cannot seem to be chill around Aaron anymore. I know I love him. I know he might love me, but I said I was going to take my time and figure all of this out. And I’m trying. I’m trying so hard, but it’s moments like this that make that feel impossible to do.
Then I look at him and he’s smiling sweetly at me. So, I smile back and say, “Of course we’re going to go to college together. I thought we already agreed on that.”
“Just making sure you didn’t change your mind.”
“Never. I want the six of us to all go together. But if not, I at least need you and Sarah.” I stop and think. “And Joel. Oh, who am I kidding? I’d be miserable without all of you.”
He laughs. “We should probably keep reading then so we don’t fail our first English test.”
We return to our previous position, lying on our stomachs, but a minute later Sarah bursts in with a garment bag in her hand.
“Rae baby! I picked up our dresses, and—oh, hey, A.”
“Hi, Sarbear.”
I smile as Sarah hangs the bag on my closet door. Inside is an emerald green dress with golden flecks throughout. It’s stretchy and from the front looks like a T-shirt dress. But the back is cut nice and low. The hem falls at my mid-thigh, just past the acceptable finger-tip length the school requires. I know I’m only going with Joel, but I’m going to look gorgeous in this dress. When I bought it—back in June before everything happened—I bought it with Aaron in mind.
My eyes quickly flit to him. He’s staring at the bag.
“Can I see it?” he asks.
Sarah reaches for the zipper, but I jump up. “No. I, uh… I don’t wantanyoneto see it until Friday.” I exchange a quick glance with Sarah, so she gets my point.
“Right. Because you’re gonna look so fabulous you’ll knock everybody’s socks off.” She gives me a little wink and walks out of the room.
I flop down next to Aaron and start reading, but I can feel his gaze on me.
“Why can’t I see it?”
