Page 63 of Falling Like This


Font Size:  

“And if he doesn’t?”

“Then he really is a fucking idiot,” Mackie deadpans.

I smile at that. “Okay. I’ll go see him later,” I say. “But for now, you get to entertain me because I need a distraction.”

The three of us order pizzas and play pool. It’s nice to hang out, just the three of us. It’s pretty rare we do, even though we were the original three. It’s always easy with Mackenzie and Joel. Mackie is an instigator and Joel likes to have fun, so we’re always laughing. I need that tonight. I think I need it more in general.

As twilight falls, I catch a glimpse of Aaron’s truck parked outside his house, so I say goodnight to Joel and Mackie and head for his back gate. But when I get there, I see Aaron on the back patio swing with Caity. He’s got his arms wrapped tight around her, the way he usually holds me. Suddenly, I don’t feel like a first choice. I feel like a third wheel.And an idiot.

Shaking my head, I turn and walk away.

I thought he loved me. I thought he wanted this. Hell, I thought he would wait for me to be ready.

But I guess I was wrong about all of it. Somehow, I missed my chance.

Aaron

I’m sitting on a patio swing with a beautiful girl in my arms. I should be happy. But even though she’s my girlfriend, she’s not my girl. She’s not the one I want to be holding.

I’d feel bad I’m dating her, given that fact, but I know she feels the same way about me.

What’s twisting in my gut was Rae’s reaction to all this. She didn’t seem like she was anywhere near ready to date.

Was I wrong?

I glance down at Caity, but my mind doesn’t leave Rae.

What was she trying to talk to me about last night? Should I go talk to her? Break up with Caity? That seems crazy. Break up with the girl I just started dating because Raemightbe into me. Or ready for me.

I mean, if she felt strongly about me, or wanted to be with me, why didn’t she tell me that?

Maybe because you told her you were dating someone else.

My spine ticks, and I look up, swearing I feel the heat of someone’s gaze on me. Not someone. Rae. But there’s no one.

I don’t know why I think she’d come over here.

“Are you okay?” Caity asks.

“Of course,” I say softly. I like Caity. She’s someone I could actually fall for. If I wasn’t hung up on the girl who’s been burrowing into my heart for the better part of the last twelve years.

So, why are you with someone else?

I let those words twist in my gut for a few minutes until reality sets in. The last few times we came close, it was clear she wasn’t ready. Maybe she still isn’t. I don’t know. But I know I don’t want to push her. I can’t lose my best friend.That’s why I’m making this choice.

Or maybe I’m a massive chickenshit.

Fuck off, brain.

I don’t want to lose the most important person in my life. If we’re meant to be… we will be, right? That’s how all that fate shit works. How all those romances Rae reads go.

What the hell am I talking about?

I’m pulled from the nonsense in my brain by Caity’s voice.

“Hey, you wanna go inside? I’m getting a little cold.”

I glance down at Caity and muster a smile. Then I look at the back gate.She’s not coming for you, idiot. Let it go.“Yeah. Sure. Let’s go.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com