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Once the blanket is spread out, Aaron pulls me down onto it with him, laying like we always do. His hand rolls over the top of mine and lightly squeezes. I intertwine my fingers with his and try not to cry. Sometimes I wish we wouldn’t have started dating in high school. I wish we would’ve figured out our friendship and stayed like that until we were a little more settled in ourselves. I miss how this used to feel. It was always fun and relaxed. Then, somewhere along the lines, it became heavy and dramatic and emotional. Maybe that’s the thing I miss the most. I miss having fun with him.
Aaron squeezes my hand and I turn to face him, wondering what he’ll see on my face.
He leans over and kisses my forehead. He smiles a childlike smile at me. One that reminds me of the five-year-old I met on the porch that day. And I smile back.
There it is.
Friendship.
It both soothes my nerves and breaks my heart. I never wanted to bejustfriendswith Aaron again once we crossed that line. But knowing that part of us is still there is comforting.
With everything inside me, I channel that energy.
I let my mind drift back to our friendship. Sure, we were best friends with something much deeper beneath the surface, but we were friends first.
I squeeze his hand back and look up at the stars. I point to a bunch and say, “Feral bunny.”
He laughs out loud and points out a few more silly constellations.
When I yawn, he says, “All right, let’s make our wishes and get you to bed, birthday girl. You know the rules. You go first, and it’s extra powerful tonight.”
I press my head against the ground, inhale deeply, and close my eyes. Then I open them, find the brightest star, and exhale while making my wish.
I wish we’ll all have an amazing weekend.
I squeeze Aaron’s hand and he repeats the same process. When he’s finished, he looks at me. “What’d you wish for?”
I elbow him. “I’ll tell you if it comes true.”
We lie in silence for a few minutes. Finally, I prop myself on my elbow. “Ace.”
“Yeah?”
“What’s the deal with you and Joel?”
Aaron gazes up at the sky. “He was a pretty crappy friend to me for a while. Now I’m being one to him because I’m angry. I want to take that anger out on someone. I know I shouldn’t. I know I’m fucking it up more.”
“You guys fought the other day?”
He nods, still not looking at me.
I drop back down onto my side and roll against him, nestling my head on his shoulder.
“Don’t give up, Ace. Work it out. Of everyone I know, no one fights for people like you do. Give him a chance.”
He turns his head and rests his lips on my forehead before softly kissing it. “I will.”
I nod and get cozier.
“Oh boy.” He runs his hand down my arm. “I know I offered to carry you, but I really don’t want to drag you all the way back inside. Come on, let’s go while you can still walk.”
He walks me inside and to my room. As we stand outside the door, awkwardness washes over us.
Yes, let’s just stare at each other. This is good.
“Uh—I—” Aaron rubs the back of his head and I start laughing.
We’re so dumb.
