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I rubbed her thigh, hoping to comfort her. She’d told me she felt alone and cut off from the world. It pissed me off. How could Justin be so heartless? Emilee wasn’t a possession. He had no right to treat her like one.
“How are you doing, honey?” Tina stood to clear the plates. “Is there anything you need? We’re all here to help you.”
Emilee looked at me, but I didn’t have an answer. I’d sent a prospect out with a shopping list earlier. Dante needed diapers and wipes, and Em needed some personal hygiene stuff. Sugar had picked up some clothes for her and the baby.
“We’ll let you know, Tina. Thanks,” I replied when Emilee didn’t.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
I wasn’t used to Emilee needing me to take the lead. I didn’t want to let her down, so I stepped up. Even though I wasn’t a social person, I’d do anything for her and my family.
“We should have a drink in my office,” Storm said out of the blue. His gray eyes cut to mine, then to Raul’s. “The three of us.”
Emilee squeezed my thigh under the table.
I entwined our fingers and whispered, “I’ll stay if you want.”
Panic attacks were a new thing for Emilee. After what had happened yesterday, it was understandable. Earlier today, while I was showering, she’d rushed into the bathroom nearly in tears with Dante in the sling. She’d had her shoes on like she was ready to bolt.
As it turned out, she’d heard gunshots. Some of my brothers were out at the range. Thepop-pop-pophad sent her into a panic, fearing the Rat Brotherhood had come for Dante. Once she knew what was going on, she calmed. I hated how she’d been traumatized. I was sure some of it also stemmed from last summer, when she’d been taken by the Dirty Hunters. She’d admitted to having nightmares about it sometimes.
When I thought about all she’d been through and not being able to comfort her, I wanted to beat the tar out of Justin for keeping us apart.
“I think I’ll be okay.”
“I’ll be down the hall.”
She nodded. “I know. Try not to be too long.”
14
Emilee
If my heart raced any faster, I’d go into cardiac arrest. Danny hadn’t been gone long when my throat constricted and my palms sweated. I didn’t like feeling this way, on the verge of losing it. The same thing had happened earlier, when he was in the shower. I’d felt like such a fool. I knew the club’s shooting range was on the property. My dad had taught me how to shoot, so I knew the sounds guns made, yet I’d freaked out.
It needed to get a grip. I couldn’t live my life like this, paranoid and hanging on the edge of a panic attack. Dante needed me to keep it together. Fear was an awful emotion. The fear of losing Dante or Danny was a million times worse.
When Danny asked me for the second time to marry him, I honestly was elated, though it didn’t come across as joy. I felt awful about it. The timing hadn’t been right with Justin missing. Danny understood, but instead of announcing it to our family and friends, we agreed it was best to keep it to ourselves until he was found.
Justin sure had a way of screwing things up for me. Despite him missing, I was still furious with him. I couldn’t even bring myself to call him dad. Maybe it was immature, given the severity of the situation. I really didn’t care what anyone thought of me. He’d put me through a year of hell. I couldn’t forgive and forget so easily. However, I did hope Justin was okay and that Cobra’s club would find him.
“Emilee, honey, are you okay?” Tina’s voice cut through my thoughts.
I blinked, bringing myself back to the present. “I’m sorry. What did you say?” I’d zoned out while Maddy, Sugar, and Tina talked about Hero and Roja’s up-and-coming wedding in November. I didn’t know Tara—Roja—too well, but I hoped to, now that I was back.
Maddy adjusted Birdie in her arms. “I’d asked if you wanted to take Dante outside for a bit. I usually take Birdie out about this time. Behind the building is shaded and it’s not so hot.”
“Oh.” I looked down at Dante staring at me, his fist in his mouth. He cracked a smile when our eyes met.
“We don’t have to if you’re uncomfortable.” The understanding in Maddy’s voice eased my nerves. I could be honest with these women. They’d never judge me.
Just come out and say it, right?“I’m not doing as well as I might appear.”
Maddy touched my hand, which rested on Dante. “How could you? After knowing someone wanted to take Dante, I don’t think I would ever leave the compound.”
Sugar cleared her throat. “Well, she would eventually leave. But at first, sweetie, it’s too fresh. MC life is not like any other. Keep in mind, the little boy next door to your house wasn’t the child of a biker. He was just taken. Bad stuff happens everywhere. Not just in MCs.”
“Sugar’s right,” Tina said. “Yesterday was terrifying. You did everything right, honey. Give yourself time to process it. And with your dad missing, I don’t know how you even got out of bed.”
