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“I’m fine. Just a little scratched up.” I revealed my palms. “But nothing I can’t handle.”
One of the security guys came over. He probably wanted my statement. Lucky me. Sleep would have to wait…
Mercy and I headed back to my car an hour later with the good doctor following us. He stayed the whole time. It unnerved me to have a man hovering.
“Hope, are you sure I can’t talk you into going inside for a proper examination?” He sure was persistent.
“I’m sure. My hands and knees will heal just fine. Thanks for helping out.” I opened the driver’s side door.
“You need to stay away from that guy.” The concern in his voice was sweet.
“Clearly.” I climbed into the driver’s seat. “See ya.”
“I’m going to ask Hustler about you. Whatever you’re hiding, I’ll find out the truth.”
“Do what you want, but you’ll see. He won’t know who you’re talking about.” I shut the door and put the key in the ignition. “My gosh, this guy is too much.”
“What if Hustler comes back?” Mercy asked.
“What if he does? He’s a player and only has hookups. I’m nobody to him.” I might’ve enjoyed my time with him, but there was no way I’d get involved with him or anyone else. Having his baby would undoubtedly complicate things, which was why I couldn’t keep it.
“I saw the way he looked at you. I think he likes you.”
“We’re not in high school anymore.” I laughed at her nonsense. “He’ll think I’m trying to trap him.”
“But you’re not.”
“He’ll be with me out of obligation. I won’t do that to a kid. I know what it’s like to not be wanted.” My heart ached as the words left my lips. I wanted the baby but knew I couldn’t care for it the way it deserved. I was too fucked up to be a halfway decent mother, no thanks to my parents who didn’t want me.
“You’re trying to talk yourself out of telling him. He just asked you out yesterday without knowing you’re pregnant.”
“Will you stop already?” I started the car and tapped my thumbs on the steering wheel. “All he wanted was to fuck me. Don’t make more out of this.”
“Fine. Let’s go home.”
“Gladly.” A hot shower and my bed were all I needed. I’d figure out my situation later. No matter what Mercy thought, it was my body and my decision whether I kept the baby or not.
I wasn’t the right person to have a kid. I’d be a horrible mother.
What the biker doesn’t know won’t hurt him. No man wants to be trapped, especially not someone like Hustler.
4
Hope
Fourteen Years Old
I drowned out my mother’s yelling in the doctor’s office. The thin blue gown I had on made me feel naked and cold. The lights above my head illuminated the scars on my legs and scratches on my arms. All “self-inflicted” was what I’d told the nurse when she asked about them. I didn’t think she believed me, but she’d gone about her business anyway. I didn’t blame her for not digging a little deeper to find out the truth. My mother was in the room. She was intimidating and a psychotic bitch. Hence this appointment…
“What do you mean she can’t get the shot?” she screeched at the doctor. “Taking the pill daily is difficult for most adults.”
“She’s too young. We recommend waiting until eighteen.”
“That is stupid. Is it better for her to get pregnant? Huh? Answer me that, doctor.” Disdain dripped from every word that left her lips. “Would you rather perform an abortion on a fourteen-year-old? Because she will not have the baby if she gets knocked up!”
I closed my eyes and silently hummed in my head, so I couldn’t hear their conversation.
This was the most embarrassing, mortifying day of my pathetic life, a life I hated like most teenagers. But I’d seen first hand my peers had it better than me. My parents were the worst, selfish and mean. They were never around, didn’t talk to me, and barely bought food.
