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18
SILAS
I ledthe way deeper into the forest, leaving the ship and all its contents far behind us. The sky overhead was a murky gray, and I feared it might get colder soon. As I walked, I kept an eye out for a cave or something that might serve as shelter when we were done exploring.
Although she didn't complain, I could see that Anya was growing colder with time. It wasn't cold enough for her to freeze to death, but I still didn't like seeing her so uncomfortable. If I thought she would allow it, I would have drawn her in close and wrapped my arms around her until she felt better, but every time I looked at her, she looked away.
At last, we stumbled upon a rocky cove, home to a few smaller caves. Anya gave them a cursory look but didn't get any closer. I, on the other hand, ducked down and made my way through the narrow entrance into the protected inner shelter. At least it provided a reprieve from the wind.
"Come on," I coaxed, offering a hand to lead her through.
She stood out there, shivering and shaking her head. "Don't you think we can find something a bit roomier?"
I looked at the sky overhead, noting how dark it had grown since the last time we'd crossed a clearing and had a good view.
"Not if we want to stay dry," I remarked. "If we stop now, we can rest, and go back out when the weather passes. Maybe the sky will clear up and we'll be able to see where we are."
Before she had a chance to argue further, the first big drop of rain splashed down, striking her in the face. She jumped in surprise and then scurried in through the entrance, skirting around my outstretched hand altogether. She pushed into the cave as far as she could and dropped to the ground, pulling her knees up and huddling into a tiny ball.
"No fire," she said firmly. "It's too dangerous."
Seeing that she was deadly serious, I only nodded.
"No fire," I agreed. "But you don't have to suffer. Come."
She shook her head, bunching her knees up higher into her chest. With a sigh, I went to her and sat down along the wall. I closed my eyes, lifted my arms and murmured Re'Utu's prayer, calling the energy to me. Strangely, it felt weak and wobbly, unsure of itself. But I needed its warmth, so I called more urgently and drew it in. When I had all I could handle, I felt the warmth flowing through me, and I pulled her into my arms.
She resisted for a second, but soon she was snuggling into me, pressing her whole body against mine. We sat like that for a long time, quiet and contemplative.
"I didn't mean for him to die," she said, breaking the stillness.
"I know."
"We didn't have another choice. We had to stop it."
"I know," I repeated softly, hugging her tightly and caressing her hair with my hand.
She sighed and leaned into me further. "Do you think we did it? Do you think we saved them?"
I rested my chin on her head and considered my answer for some time. "I like to think so."
I didn't know what else to say. I didn't want her to feel guilty for what she'd done, and I didn't want her to spend the whole night worrying about whether it was the right decision.
She pulled away slightly and raised her face to mine. I waited for her to speak, only to be caught off guard when she leaned in and kissed me. Her lips were as soft as I remembered, although they were cool against mine. Her tongue ran across my lower lip, tasting me, and when I sighed with sudden desire, she pushed her tongue deep into my mouth and circled it around my own.
Every part of me wanted her, wanted to drag her into my lap and have her, but I feared that she would pull away again. I didn't want to push her. I was afraid that she was acting without thinking, or maybe as a means of avoiding thinking altogether. If I was going to have her, I wanted her to give herself to me freely. I was torn between pushing her away and pulling her closer.
Yet, as if reading my thoughts, she broke away from my lips and nuzzled her head up under my chin. She kissed me softly, once and then twice, until her now warm lips rested just below the lobe of my ear and her hot breath caressed my skin so softly it made my scales flex and brush together.
"Anya, I..."
She wriggled against me for a moment and then I felt the scrape of her teeth on my earlobe as she purred into my ear.
"I'm so cold, Silas," she breathed, a tiny whimper in her voice. "You could warm me up."
She wriggled again, pressing her breasts against me as her hand came up to my stomach and then slid downward with only a cursory pause.
"Are you sure?"
