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“Shit,I’m going to be late,” I mutter as I tuck my head against my chest and jog toward Theo’s apartment complex. Rain hits my exposed skin and slams into puddles on the ground. I pump my legs a little faster just to get inside and up the stairs, and when I finally make it to his door, my heart is pounding out of my chest, more from nerves than exertion. I exhale deeply.
Okay, I can do this. I can see Theo again today without making it weird.
Last night, as I was leaving, I passed another guy who stopped at Theo’s door. I don’t think it was another student looking for tutoring. He didn’t have any books and he looked a littletoofriendly.
I spent the better part of last night obsessing about it—wondering if Theo fucked him and told him all of his secrets.
“Come in,” Theo says, and I eyeball him. He’s wearing just an oversized green T-shirt, his long, toned legs on display. I run my eyes over them, stopping where the shirt ends. I wonder what he has on underneath.
My fingers itch to slide up this thigh and lift the hem up to see. But I won’t do that because today is the first day that everything is supposed to revert back to normal. Not sure what normal is, to be honest. That word doesn’t define anything that has gone on between us.
What we’re doing is a little fucked up. I can admit that. But I’m not really complaining, either. I don’t mind a little weirdness in my life—makes things interesting.
“How are you doing?” I ask, but he doesn’t respond. He doesn’t even meet my gaze as I take my seat on the floor in front of his bed.
Huh. When he said he wanted things to go back to normal, I kind of expected us to at least be friendly.
He’s not being friendly. He’s as cold and distant as the first time I laid eyes on him.
Curie is staring at me from across the room and licks her paw with indifference. Even she’s not having it.
“Tell me what you want to review today,” he says in a clipped voice, and I stare at him in disbelief.
“For real?” I ask.
He flicks his eyes up to mine and then looks away. He’s tapping the whiteboard marker on the floor repeatedly, and it’s driving me nuts.
“What would you like to go over?”
I sigh and run a hand over my face. If this is how it’s gonna be, fine.
“I have a quiz on Tuesday.” I hand him a paper and say, “This is what it’s on.”
He glances down at it and then nods. “Okay.”
He starts to go over the concepts, and I try my best to stay focused, but it’s hard when my attention is torn. My gaze slides to his legs, and my mind wonders what’s underneath the shirt, and then it latches onto the fact that his demeanor is cold as ice. And he might have fucked another dude last night.
Curie makes her way over to me, and I pet her behind her ears, but then she bites me roughly, and I glower at her.
It seems I’m better off just not engaging. Doesn’t help that earlier today, I promised my brother I’d visit him this weekend with Finn. So, I’m dealing with the anxiety of that as well.
My mind is royally fucked at the moment. I need to find a way to move past this guilt I have inside of me because there’s no changing what happened to Landon. I need to have an actual conversation with him.
Hell. I hate all of this shit.
“Where do you want me?” I ask when Theo suddenly shuts the book, signaling the end of our tutoring session.
He rolls his lips between his teeth and shakes his head. “No payment necessary. I’ll continue to meet with you for free.”
What the fuck? We had an agreement. We shook hands on it.
“No. No way, man. That’s not fair. Why are you being like this? Is it because you fucked that guy last night?”
He won’t look at me, and I set the chemistry book on the floor.
“That’s it, isn’t it?”
